Five-Hundred Word Challenge 428: Complaining About Being Ill

OH, how I feel rancid on this very morning of the requiring of the work.

Well, I don’t feel as bad as I did last night and I’m pretty sure I’ve passed the peak of this annoying cold, but still, I’m going to complain as much as I can about the situation as that is what I want to do this morning.

It’s a lot better than complaining about customers. Well, maybe not better, but it is still something worthy of my time.

Well, not actually, but… anyway…

This cold is horrible! It rains down tyranny upon my very being and shakes me to the core! What am I to do in this horrid situation?

My nose is no longer running, but my soul has long since sprinted away from me!

There is no escape. It is all downhill from here.

What a terrible fate!

Thankfully, not a terrible fete.

That would probably be worse, if I am to so say so myself.

Well, with that being said, what is positive about this cold?

It seems to be comfortable. That is not a positive.

It seems to slow me down far more than I could ever wish. That is also not a positive.

There is only one way out and that way is through rest and recovery.
Supposedly also through the consumption of a significant amount of water.

Hopefully not too significant an amount.

To be honest, I’m surprised as to how quickly I’m rebounding, but I imagine that I’m deluding myself, or something.

With that being said, so long as I recover quickly, I can get back to doing the things that I do at an accelerated pace, which will in turn lead to something else (possibly).

I don’t even know as to what I’m going on about anymore!

Is this really my life?!

Is it?!


I think at this point it is fairly apparent that I’ve run out of words to type when it comes to talking about being ill as it’s really not an interesting subject. However, I’m sure that I can stretch this out into something much better which will in turn hopefully lead to some sort of realisation of my brilliance.

Well, now I’m really into delusional territory.

Perhaps I am far more firmly within the grasp of the illness and it is taking over my mind.

Suppose that there is a cold that is trying to trick me. How would I know?

Well, there are probably a few ways to find out.

However, what if the cold is trying to trick me into thinking that it is deluding me by making me think and feel that I am ill when I am in fact not actually ill?

How would I know?

Well, I don’t know right now as in a few minutes I will be starting work and that is currently a more important thing to consider, although the only considering I need to do is for the customers and their many questions.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:22:68

This was pretty fun.

Well, it was kind of fun.

A bit of a dip before it picks back up whilst remaining a lengthy ramble.

Written at work.

About Stupidity Hole

I'm some guy that does stuff. Hoping to one day fill the internet with enough insane ramblings to impress a cannibal rat ship. I do more than I probably should. I have a page called MS Paint Masterpieces that you may be interested in checking out. I also co-run Culture Eater, an online zine for covering the arts among other things. We're on Patreon!
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