Alright, so yesterday’s plan didn’t pan out, and that’s mostly due to being absolutely wrecked by the time I got home. I’m mentioning it now, even though I’m not writing about it for the rest of this rambling because I feel like I have to, for some reason.

Trying again today.

Could give up and stop writing, but trying again today. Trying to power through. Going to see if I can achieve what I set out to do yesterday. If I do, I’ll write about it. If I don’t, I will try again tomorrow. However, I need to try and make sure there’s differentiation among all the things and that sort of thing. So maybe it won’t happen and maybe it will. I can certainly put barriers up, but I also need to be able to take them down, or rather I need to be willing to take them down.

I wonder how  many people have read this space. I wonder as to how many lives have come and gone over the years. It’s not necessarily something worth thinking about too much, but I do. I think about it and I think about everything and nothing. I wonder if anyone who has read any of the crap I’ve written has gotten something for the better out of all of it. Don’t know, but I can certainly try.

Things are approaching fast, and I’m not talking about the potential homelessness this time. I’m talking about a particular day where I’m going to announce a particular thing, and I don’t have much of it planned out, but it will reveal itself over time… or something. You get the idea.

So despite my feeling like shit at the moment, I have at least some exciting things coming up, and that’s pretty good. There is some sadness among it, and definitely some hesitation and anxiety, but this will be a good thing for me, and will also add to an increasingly overwhelming sense of relief.

It’s also going to push me into a highly productive period of time and there’s a good chance I’ll burn out by the end of it, but there are goals and targets and all those things and It’ll be good for me in the end.

So… yeah. What else do I have to say? What else can I say right now? I mean, there are plenty of things of course, but there’s always plenty of things. There’s rarely an end to what can be said and done, even if someone repeats themselves over and over for what seems like an eternity. Just need to get off the track at some point and go from there. If unable to, then see if the track can be redirected so other things start coming in.

I feel like shit at the moment, but there’s a lot of wonder out there. There’s plenty of life left to live, and I’m trying to get back to living it. It just might take some time.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:15:34

Not what I was expecting, to be honest. Bit of stretching, but I’ve hinted at something big coming, or rather small, or big in a small way, and so on, and I think that came across clearly enough.

Written at work.