Reference Photo, Late 2025

Posted on March 4, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

This is a reference photo that I took to get across a pose I wanted someone to hold. It was as close an approximation I could get to the idea I had in mind, which I’ve spoken about before but I’m feeling too lazy to go digging right now to link it here. Essentially the idea didn’t work in without editing beyond processing, which is something I don’t like to do. As such, this is as close to it as I could get.

There wasn’t anything in particular that I was looking to convey with the idea. I was looking more at form than anything else, so par of the course. I do think I was looking at an idea of fragility and trying to be guarded about it. A defensiveness.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. Margaret of From Pyrenees to Penines hosts the next one one, and she has chosen the theme of “Walls”.

This challenge is open to all, and I recommend joining in. If want to, check out more information about it here, and include the tag “monochrome-madness” when you share your photo. If you’d prefer not to join in, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography, and what other people submit.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1568: Music Playing

Posted on March 4, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

Another day sitting outside of the work building. Another day waiting for it to open so I can get in, and someone behind me is playing some of the worst music one can play at this hour of the morning. It’s great.

It’s not great.

I could sit anywhere else where there is seating available. I could sit on the stairs if I so wished. However, I chose here and here is where I am choosing to remain whilst I churn out a bunch of words in a particular order to and so on and so forth.

Getting closer to the end and I’m wondering if there is anything of value that I have put out. Anything of value that goes beyond the personal. I wonder. I think. I question my decisions.

I could go for another coffee, really. No money for it… for now. Perhaps later.

This music that’s playing is pretty ho-hum, really. Maybe not the worst music. Just boring. Dull. Lacking shape, lacking anything that it could genuinely offer. Sleepy music. I could go for something a bit more dangerous. Not something that is dangerous, mind you; just something that’s a bit more dangerous. Something that’ll actually say something beyond “I wanna shag you”, of which this music is.

Sitting here, thinking to myself. Looking at lights that look like reflections, though they aren’t. They just look that way. Reminds me of looking out of an office window and seeing the lights reflected back. All in lines, all spaced. All a pattern that appears interesting from some angles and menacing and foreboding from others.

This chair is cold and I’m appreciating that fact. It’s not a hot morning, but it’s nice to have a cold chair this morning. It sort of keeps the music at bay, which keeps on going. It keeps on going incessantly, trying to destroy my ears. It puts me to sleep, but there are some nice bits, and it’s kind of fun, too. And sometimes a bit of fun is a nice thing to have in a life.

Well, maybe fun is a nice thing to have most of the time. Probably is.

I’m suddenly reminded of walking through a housing estate from my way home from primary school. I’d wonder what was in the houses. I’d wonder about the place. It wasn’t always there, and then it was. It was this thing that just appeared and I’d walk through it occasionally, and it was interesting to me as a kid. Probably because it was somewhere new to walk through and explore and see. I’d think about the places and I’d think about how walking through it saved time, though it probably didn’t.

That housing estate was more interesting to me as a kid than this music is to me now, but this music is fun. Enjoyable, even. I could enjoy it at a gig and I could jump up and down to it. I should try and find out who it is.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 07:24:28

Around finishing this bit of writing the music that I was getting into stopped, and now the people playing it are onto something else. Oh well.

Written at work.

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One Thousand Word Challenge 245: Silly and Serious Writing

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

Here we are. The day is the afternoon or the evening. I think it’s the afternoon. I can’t tell with time anymore.

It’s the afternoon. Should be the evening. It is not.

I am so confused with time right now. Last week I had five weeks left on my work contract. Now I have less than two. I don’t know what’s going on anymore. Where am I? Who am I? What delectables await me over yonder? Is there even a yonder to go over to? I don;’t know anymore. I don’t know anything. I don’t know everything, either. I’m in a state of knowing so much nothing that I don’t know anything.

Where is everyone? How is everyone? Where do I find myself when I am looking square.y in the eyes of the precipice of blissful dilation if the contrapuntal extremities are not being embraced by the dissemination transmissions upon which where those colours known as cerulean and azure blend to form some sort of whimsical testimony generator?

What am I even going on about?

I find that I’m just getting everything out right now, and getting everything out is right on, or right off. It depends on where the perspective of the view lies, and those views are not doing much for my fortifications in the west of… my bedroom, I guess. However, if there are other ways around the forests and the moors of their world, then I am not one who will fight against all of this.

However, I will definitely be doing more writing tomorrow, unless I don’t, in which case I won’t. Considered yourselves warned. Consider yourselves aghast at the amount of crap one person can churn out.

So I don’t know what I am doing right now. I mean, I do know, but I don’t know. Therefore there is a sense of mystery. There is a sense of the unknown. A dense fog rises and covers everything. Detail is smeared and erased, and terrible times await those who refuse to find themselves healthily contained within the solitude in which their attitude reigns supreme.

Okay. Maybe I need to stop writing right now. Maybe I should just rest. I still have a few hours to go, but rest could be good. Rest could be desirable, even. However, I am possessed by a dire temerity and so I must persist, even though it is unwise to do so.

When I think of what I am doing right now, I think I am just trying to get a lot of silliness out of my system. I’m also trying to help myself feel like I haven’t wasted the day. Now I know that I haven’t. I was working, after all. However, I do also feel that I have. I feel that I need to try and do something with it, even if that something is just spewing words onto a digital screen. If I do that, then perhaps there is some meaning in the day that isn’t related to just throwing a bunch of emails out there and throwing a bunch of messages at people.

I can keep writing silly things, but if I do that I might be attacked by some sort of shark of the annoyed variety, for all these words must go somewhere and they certainly aren’t going into the recycling. Perhaps I must ingratiate myself to the sharks. Ingratiate myself to the creatures of the oceans so that they don’t engage in some sort of uprising against my ridiculous quest to do whatever it is that I am doing.

So I guess I should think about things a bit more, really. Try to apply for more jobs. Do all of those things. Hope for the best. Hope that something happens that’ll allow me some sort of rest. A lengthy torpor, maybe. Something that allows me to rest my pharyngeal region, for even though I have not worked on the phones for nearly two years now, it still needs rest.

I think that I’m starting to get a bit excited about things happening. I don’t know if I am,. but I think I am. But I need to write more silliness. I need to find a way to force my windows to work the way they’re intended to, also. They live a fairly sedentary life, and sure that’s all fine and all, but they need to work in a way where they don’t need to be propped open in order to have them open. They are not operating the way they are meant to. This does not please me. I am displeased. I am so displeased that I don’t think I will write more silliness. I think that, instead, I will find the way I need to find that shows me the way to get out of the hay of life and thus onto the moving walkway of success, of which will be done in an order best described as “subsequent”. Once that happens, I’m set. I’m all good. I’ll be where I want to be and there will be someone who will be where they need to be, and that will be me. Success will finally be mine. Finally.

I am so tired of the struggle. I’m tired of the churn of work days, but I can do this. I can write silliness for now, and that interests me right now. It helps take the edge off a bit and it’s helping me cope with the upcoming potential unemployment. I don’t know what comes next. It’s all scary. I still persist, however. There is no point in me not persisting. It won’t solve anything, so I need to keep chugging along, keep on writing, keep on working toward the end of this blog and then suddenly win the lottery so I can finally have some rest.

Then I can spend some time feeding the fish and catching up on reading my books, and that’ll show everyone. That’ll show them who the real boss is.

The time it took to write one thousand words: 13:16:65

Decent speed. Not my finest bit of gibberish, but decent speed.

Written at home.

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Hitoshi Sakimoto: Near the Water

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

I went in once more thinking about where this song is used. I realise I could’ve said something a bit different which would’ve been more fitting, but the below is what I went for and it does work a little.

Hitoshi Sakimoto’s (崎元 仁) “Near the Water” (“安息の時”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto, and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo (松尾 早人), Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

I hope you enjoy.

—

A bit of joy and a bit of relaxation comes through. Sure, there’s tension but the sun shines in this busy, yet relaxed area. It feels the tension of conflict, but it remains an area to take it easy and think. Or at least have time to think.

There’s some melancholy, sure, but it’s those times. It’s something that one can rise above. Thoughts do not need to sink. And there’s some playfulness here, too.

This is a space at a crossroads, where many meet and others stop for the remaining journey ahead. This is a space that has gentle flows as it does rough, and it sees commotion and activity every day. Most importantly, it’s a place that keeps the pressure low. It’s a place that offers stability, even as the sounds fade and the song ends.

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Hitoshi Sakimoto: The Sochen Cave Palace

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and I wasn’t sure as to what to go for here. Once more I was thinking about where the song is used and it sort of works, but I was thinking too much. The writing is rigid and it feels a bit like trying to find things to say rather than words coming forward.

Hitoshi Sakimoto’s (崎元 仁) “The Sochen Cave Palace” (“ソーヘン地下宮殿”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto, and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo (松尾 早人), Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

I hope you enjoy.

—

A wondrous space, an ancient space. A place once used and now fallen to mystery. It carries a stately, regal atmosphere and it also carries danger.

The sounds change to something a bit darker and foreboding. They urge along whilst they lurk in the dark, near ornate structures and forgotten designs. They push and urge, and they work to move things forward.

The sounds speak of history and time passed, and they speak steadily. They speak slowly, and they show only enough, and that wonder strikes. That wonder strikes to speak of glorious times past, but it does not last. It falls away as one grasp; one attempt to hold on, before fading away as the song ends.

 

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Hitoshi Sakimoto: Destiny

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and with this one I don’t know what was going on. I’m pretty familiar with the game and so I ended up channeling where I remember this piece of music being used, though I strongly suspect I was remembering incorrectly.

Hitoshi Sakimoto’s (崎元 仁) “Destiny” (“宿命”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto, and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo (松尾 早人), Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

As a side note, this song reminds me a lot of the Breath of Fire: Dragon Quarter soundtrack, which Hitoshi Sakimoto also composed.

I hope you enjoy.

—

A dramatic moment held on the steps of strings. The weight of expectation is something to now shake off. Realisation and acceptance come forward and reveal themselves, for doubt allowed for thought. Allowed for questioning and coming to accept that there are other ways to walk forward, and in a way it is comforting.

Knowing that someone isn’t going to lose themselves; that there are things greater than tunneling down into one thing helps bolster resolve to see things through, and it isn’t seen alone. It is seen with others, and so one path is walked away from whilst another is now followed as the sounds fade and the song ends.

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Hitoshi Sakimoto: The Salikawood

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

Trying to describe what was happening with the instruments was what my mind decided was the way to go here, and in a way I think it helped. Had I written more freely, I think I wouldn’t have written anything at all.

Hitoshi Sakimoto’s (崎元 仁) “The Salkiawood” (“サリカ樹林”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto, and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo (松尾 早人), Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

I hope you enjoy.

—

Sounds flow through a spacious, deep area, and some wonder blooms forward as various areas lay themselves out and spread away. Keys take centre stage for a moment, settling and scattering and bunching up. Then more sound comes in, building some tension, finding paths then blooms and flourishes in a dramatic display, before returning to the start.

And so the space frames itself once more, and great moods find themselves spread thick. Textures and tones rise and curl around and bloom out once more, finding the rises and falls and the moment to punctuate and emphasise. It’s almost a breath of air, or at least a moment of respite before going back in as the sounds fade away and the song ends.

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Hitoshi Sakimoto: Time for a Rest

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

I tried to dig more into a way that the song conveys a sense of rest. I think my mind was telling me that I need to rest more than anything, however.

Hitoshi Sakimoto’s (崎元 仁) “Time for a Rest” (“安息の時”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto, and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo (松尾 早人), Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

I hope you enjoy.

—

Gentle sounds create a comfort and a sense of relaxation. Not complete relaxation – there’s still some danger among the sounds – but enough to know that there’s safety. And relaxation fully takes over, a deep exhaling leads to limbs softening and muscles easing up.

Rest comes in small doses, though it always feels long enough, and always at necessary spots. It keeps things going, gives time to regroup thoughts and work out the journey ahead. It keeps things going at a steady pace, and it does wonders, even as the sounds fade and the song ends.

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Hayato Matsuo: Seeking Power

Posted on March 3, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and this one was a bit of a struggle to do. I decided to go more for a really vague narrative than anything else which helped. Still, I wasn’t able to switch off enough and that comes through.

Hayato Matsuo’s (松尾 早人) “Seeking Power” (“求めし力”) is from  the soundtrack for Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XII Original Soundtrack. The soundtrack was composed predominantly by Hitoshi Sakimoto (崎元 仁), and features contributions from Hayato Matsuo, Masaharu Iwata (岩田 匡治) and Nobuo Uematsu (植松 伸夫).

I hope you enjoy.

—

Pressing atmosphere whilst asking heavy questions. Sounds move with tension; with terseness. Steady, slowly, unfurling, revealing more of a situation. Of what drives questions and pushes them further and further. Of moving to the next steps.

There’s some hesitancy. Some self-pushback. Uncertainty in whether this is the right thing and through it realisation comes. That realisation can serve well, but before it can be realised the sounds return to where they began.

Rising and falling in a pressured space. Arguments, reasoning… words back and forth. Questions about how to go ahead. How to move forward. What comes at the cost of achieving goals if those goals refuse to consider options. And on it continues as the sounds fade away and the song ends.

 

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Exit Sign

Posted on March 2, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

Thought I’d shared this one already, but I haven’t from what I can tell.

I don’t know why I thought capturing this sign at this angle would be a good idea. I like the result, but it’s an odd photo.

I hope you enjoy.

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