Currently My Own

Posted on February 25, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

It’s a nice, cool morning and I’m sitting outside of my work building, waiting a few minutes before I can swipe to get in. I’m sitting here without music playing and I’m listening to the traffic pass by. I’m listening to the space around me and I don’t have music playing for the first time in a long time.

Generally I prefer to write with music playing, but today I don’t feel like it. I don’t know why, but it’s fine. It’s nice, in a way. Change of pace and all that stuff. But I’m sitting here and I’m thinking of getting serious, though I don’t want to. I want to keep things lax and easy. I want to keep things all nice and pleasant, but being serious doesn’t mean getting heavy, really. It just means being serious.

Less than three weeks left on my current contract. It’s getting close and I’m not enjoying this, but I’m doing what I can, Just need to keep going. Need to keep surviving and doing my best to thrive during uncertain circumstances. It could be worse. Could be better, but could be worse.

There you go. I got heavy.

Anyway, that is looming over me, but I can still appreciate some things right now. Always can. Sure, there’s the noise of traffic but I am in this space that is mostly empty at the moment. Mostly, but not entirely. People are starting to appear and I’ve been able to hear people talking for the past fifteen minutes, maybe longer. But where I am sitting I am the only person. I am sitting where there are seats and tables and they sit on fake grass, and sunlight is touching them. Bright enough to see that they’re here, but not so much that shade is pushed away.

They feel still and unused, and right now they are. This area will be busier later. Right now it feels quiet, empty. Almost isolated. It feels almost like an area where one should not sit, and right now I am sitting in it and I am breaking the spell of stillness. I am creating ripples in the implied silence.

This area probably spends almost all of its time shaded to some extent. I don’t think there’s a spot here where the sun is visible. I could be wrong there, but I suspect it is the case. It’s nice right now as this space is currently my own. It’s no one else’s, but eventually it will be for other people, and that’ll also be nice.

Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1565: Slide Around

Posted on February 24, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

More sweating today. More losing weight through the p9ower of sweat. Coated in a film and now I’m gonna go sliding to wherever I please. That is what I’m gonna do and there are few who can stop me. Probably few who would want to stop me.

I will be like a fish and slide around all over the place. An incredibly slimy fish. The film on me is so thick that I’m surprised I can even sit on my chair. Just absolutely filthy and atrocious.

Oh sure, I could have a shower right now. I could cool down and take better care of myself, but why would I do that when I have the power of being able to just slide for ages? I could slide to the mountains right now and I wouldn’t stop until I got there. Then I’d watch the sunset… tomorrow, on account of taking a while to get there by sliding. It wouldn’t take that long, to be fair, but it still would be a good few hours and I’d need rest after. I’d miss the sunset now, too, or rather the sunset which is soon. Therefore, there would be a need for rest.

Could probably just sleep under the stars, really treat myself to an open sky and take it all in, feel on top of the world or something. You know.

So where would I go after that? I supposed I’d go further west, stop off at Ewe and Anna’s, see how they’re doing. Specify that they can’t hug me as I’ll end up sliding through their grip. Specify no showers either as I need to make sure my filthy film remains intact. Then I’d keep going west after a few days. Go west and go see what else lies out there, beyond.

I’d go far. I’d slide a long way, and I’d keep on going, hoping that the film remains intact. Would need enough warm days in a row for that to happen, of course, but it would happen… hopefully. The moment it starts raining, I’d be in trouble if there was no shelter around. Or would I?

The rain would wash away the film, and I’d be a bit screwed and I’d have to deal with that situation. It would be an incredibly long walk back home and I wouldn’t want to hitchhike. Ergo, shelter would be the best move.

Once the rain passed I’d continue on my journey further west. I’d slide under open skies and through the dark, where there are no lights. Where everything is night and the stars reign supreme, shining and providing awe and wonder, and it would be beautiful and wonderful, and everything would be great. Everything would be fantastic, and I’d keep sliding underneath that. I’d keep going and I’d go for as far as I could, and I’d wonder to myself if life was meant to be so small and grand in that particular moment. I’d wonder, and I’d feel so lucky.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:56:36

I am so horribly sweaty at the moment. Glad I was able to get this bit of writing from it, though.

Written at home.

Posted in Fiction | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Pelican on a Light

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

Whilst up north in Hawks Nest, I was fortunate enough to see pelicans on street lights. Took a photo of one or two of them, and this was the best photo of the lot. I haven’t seen pelicans roost on lights before, so it was peculiar to me, and this one standing there, preparing to roost, was one of the easier ones to capture, so I did.

This is my submission into the three hundred-and-eighty-sixth Lens-Artists Photo Challenge. The theme for this one is “The Power of Juxtaposition“.

I went with organic and inorganic / natural and unnatural.

The host of the Lens-Artists challenges cycles weekly between the following people:

Tina

Patti

Ann-Christine aka Leya

John Steiner

Sofia Alves

Anne Sandler

Egídio

Ritva

Beth

This one is curated by Patti. The next one is curated by John.

I recommend joining the community and participating in the challenges. They’re pretty straightforward, allow room for interpretation, and provide a good way to think about photography in general. If not, however, then at the very least you should check out what others submit to the challenges.

I hope you enjoy.

Posted in Photography | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1564: Unprofessional Behaviour

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

It seems like I still have one more in me. Don’t know how or why, but I do and so it’s time for more abuse of the English language!

Don’t stop me now. Or do. I care not either way. I can still entertain myself. However, can you entertain yourself? That is not a question to ask here.

So anyway,. I think that when the rain falls up and I’m sitting on the maneuver scooter on my way to what sits where is not here, but rather somewhere over there, I have to make sure that I’ve got the right feeling coming across. There are acres upon acres of land to still feel sad about, and I’m one happy guy, or something.

What is this?

Err, I mean… So anyway, there was this fish and the fish was full of gibberish. It knew not where to eat, but rather how, and it followed its trout snout all the way home in order to rumble its rumbly tummy. To its friend, it said “Dear lord, I must so verily say unto you and unto thee, what a tee hee hee”, to which its friend responded with nothing more than abstract silence.

The fish, not knowing how to respond to this, inverted itself. Slowly its skin remained exactly the same as it was before, and no change was witnessed. However, now the fish was upside down. This was in contravention to the expected positioning, which was downside up. And that’s the way it goes sometimes.

And so the fish melted away and all was right with the world and there was nothing left to say. There was nothing left to experience. Everything was has now been and the land dissipated. It had other places to be, and its break was far from here. It needed to be seen working and what it was seen doing was gallivanting, by staying as still as possible and being as land as land could possibly be. However, this was all under the sea.

So anyway, that was all done and then where to from here? There was no one to know and no one to ask, and silence reigned bolts of violent terror across the land, hassled the babes, destroyed the churches and finally stole the pants of men, and men were not willing to stand for that, mostly because they were not comfortable not wearing pants. Silly men.

So anyway, not much of much else happened from there. You could say that there was more terror, but rather there was less terror. Terror on the plains and the fields of deception, and then there was peace. And everything went on like this for far too many hours. Far too many hours, and the ridges saw eyes grow upon them as people from a distance looked on.

Then, after all of this, the fish returned somehow and because the fish was a serous fish, everything went back to normal. Unprofessional behaviour is not desired, after all.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 05:26:13

Another nonsense bit of writing, and another that I enjoyed writing.

Written at home.

Posted in Fiction | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

One Thousand Word Challenge 242: Churn out More Words

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

It has been a day. It couldn’t be anything else than a day. And now I commit to doing possibly the worst thing I’ve ever committed to. I am going to churn out more words in more cramped spaces than I ever could. This is a bad idea. This is a really bad idea.

Why cramped spaces? I don’t know; it sounded cool.

But anyway, There’s less than two months to go and I’ve got a lot of getting through things to do in that time. I’ve slowed down far too much over the past year. It has been almost a year since getting dumped and that was a massive block to my getting much of anything done, really. There are quite a few things that I’m not going to be able to get done at this stage and so I’ve made my peace with that as best as I can. However, I can still get some things done and so getting things done is what I’m going to now do.

I can still cram in a lot of crap and I need to, anyway. There are definitely things that I am going to be doing before the end, such as responding to every missed comment that I have intended to respond to. That’s going to take a while but I can get it done. It’ll take a lot of focus and dedication, but it’ll happen. The writing is going to be the big one, however.

I’m not necessarily aiming to get a certain amount of words written at this juncture. What I am aiming to do, however, is get a certain amount of posts written, and that is something that I can do. That is something I can knock out of the park, but that will take a lot of time and effort and those are two things I’m not sure I have a lot of. But I will try. The least I can do about anything is try, really.

So I’m sitting here and I’m, trying to figure out how I go about doing this. I know that in terms of posts there are a lot of things I can clear out now, and if you’ve had a look at today, that’s already happening. Tomorrow might also be full-on in this regard. That’ll keep me going for a while, at least. Beyond that? No idea, but I’m going to try. I’m going to be incredibly drained at the end of it all, but it’ll be worth it. The celebration starts now, or something.

Watch, I’ll last only a few days and then fall back into laziness.

So anyway… yeah. That’s about all I had to say about much of anything. I’ve already been hurting myself today. My wrist is feeling weak and I don’t know how much longer I can keep up this pace, if I am to be honest. But I’m going to try and keep it up because I want to. I feel that, perhaps somewhere in me, I need to try and justify all of this to myself. That Stupidity Hole was worth it, or rather, all the crap that I’ve churned out was worth it. I don’t quite know how my doing all of this writing will do that. I don’t know how draining myself will help there, but I feel it will. Somehow.

I think about the passage of time. I think about last year and all the hurt and pain and misery, and I think about where I am now, and not much has changed, though I am happier and healthier. How long that will last, I don’t know, but I need to take advantage of what I can where I can, however I can, and this bit of health is something I need to hold onto for as long as possible. Maybe it can get better. I don;’t know.

But I think about this, and I think about the next… six weeks? Seven weeks? However long it is, and I’m thinking about what lies ahead and what comes after, and I’m anxious but I’m excited. So long as I can stay healthy through it all, I can get it done. I hope I can get it done. I will get it done.

For now, soon I rest and when I rest I will be doing more writing, because apparently I’m bad at stopping. But right now that’s okay. Today has been a long day and so will tomorrow. Time is not getting shorter for me and so I need to take advantage of what I’ve got. I need to prepare myself and get through everything I need to get through. There is a lot to do, and not much time to do it in, but it can be done and maybe it will be done. Who is to say at this juncture in time.

I think about today as well, and how it was as a work day. Not much happened and a lot happened. It was… boring. That’s the way I want it, however. I don’t want to be attacked with excitement all the time. My job is a vehicle for me to get the things I want to get done, done. Soon it will come to an end and there is hope, but I don’t know what will come forward. I don’t know if anything will come forward. A bit scared there too, so writing far more than necessary will probably help distract me for the next few weeks. Don’t know. Will have to see. Will have to find out. Only one way to find out, too, and that’s by distracting myself.

Well, I think I’ve said just about everything that I can say right now. I need to go make myself something to eat. I need to rest. I won’t rest, but I need to. And I need to listen to something that’s easy for me to listen to. Or not. I just need to keep living, really.

The time it took to write one thousand words: 11:07:54

Good speed, I think. A lot of stretching things out, but good speed.

Written at home.

Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair: Möbius

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

Another struggle, and I think it’s because I was worried about being too obvious here. I don’t know why I’d worry about that. I think it was lurking in there, somewhere. However, I think I was. What I wrote feels like it’s an easy grab and that doesn’t offer enough. The song is straightforward, but it carries the weight of narrative and I think it deserved more than me going “Yeah, relief!”. I did move a little away from that, but not enough.

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair’s (光田 康典 & ミレニアル・フェア) “Möbius” is from Creid. The album is an arranged soundtrack based on music from Xenogears.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Almost like the dawn of a new day, looking across a grand space. Looking across where the journey went, and thinking about the relief that comes across. A voice calls across the instruments in this moment. This moment of relief, of joy, of being able to breathe again. Breathe and sigh and smile, and be glad for the respite.

There is some sadness in here, because even the smallest step can take a great deal of effort, even if that effort isn’t realised at the time. And the sounds continue on gently, almost caressing, saying that it’s all okay. And percussion comes in, striking, precise, steady, almost powerful. Almost lifting everything up further. And it’s all okay. Everything is okay.

But that sadness remains. That pondering, once more over the vastness of the world as guitar plays out, calls into the distance and seeks, and tears away, knowing. And it continues as it moves further away and the vocals take over once more. They remain as they have been before; gentle, but they too take off for a moment before returning to their gentle glide, and the guitar is still there, burning until it disappears, and only a few sounds remain.

A few sounds linger, comfort, caress. They carry relief. The vocals return, touching. They are inviting, and all is inviting and grand and minor at the same time. Incredibly humble and small, and it’s a beautiful moment, and lightly poignant, and finds its closure as the song ends.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair: Lahan

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and I hit a wall early on in this one. Got too stuck on the idea of trying to detail the imagery I was getting. I think I captured the song well enough, but I think it’s clear how much I stumbled.

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair’s (光田 康典 & ミレニアル・フェア) “Lahan” is from Creid. The album is an arranged soundtrack based on music from Xenogears.

I hope you enjoy.

—

A few percussive strikes and everything is now festive. Everything is moving, lively. There is life here. Bristling with it. Sounds glide in and around each other, and there seems to be some sort of dancing happening. Some sort of dance among the hustle and bustle. And the sounds continue on.

Weaving in and out, bringing colour and life to everything, picking up in energy and intensity as the sounds descend into a moment for pause among the throng. And once a sense of location is restored, onward the journey continues.

All sorts of people will all sorts of dispositions continue their way, continue on, and somewhere there is a dance. There are festivities, and there is joy, and that joy moves to and fro, and people go about their business. They interact, they agree and disagree, they laugh and cry, and they find themselves firmly alive. Firmly alive and in the moment, and among the spirit of it all.

And voices come down and people sing, and it seems almost introspective. Almost pondering, but it doesn’t last and festivities take over in full, moving toward a point where it’s just the voices socialising at the song’s end.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair: October Mermaid

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and this one felt like it took a while. I was thinking far too much which led to a lot more grasping than usual.

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair’s (光田 康典 & ミレニアル・フェア) “October Mermaid” is from Creid. The album is an arranged soundtrack based on music from Xenogears.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Twinkling harp, floating in emptiness, stepping carefully, showing some sort of fragile grace. Something behind it starts stirring, and eventually bass and fiddle come in, joining the procession.

Other sounds come in and call, and woodwind changes the shape and direction. All of this feels incredibly small, and somehow important, and the sounds move toward a point. They move toward somewhere that’s focused, but they move together and do not compress into each other.

And they stop and the harp floats, though now with other sounds. They float in emptiness and they stay small. All the sounds move on, perhaps in isolation. Perhaps in a barren space, searching, looking for something. Wondering whilst wandering. Perhaps in a space rich with life, and leaving a bit of curiosity and mystery once the sounds stop and the song ends.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair: Melkaba

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

I put this one off for a while, and I’m not sure why. Maybe I felt a bit of hesitancy due to how the song flows. I don’t know. Anyway, I tackled it a bit earlier and  think what I wrote works, though I do wish I kept moving toward imagery.

Yasunori Mitsuda & Millenial Fair’s (光田 康典 & ミレニアル・フェア) “Melkaba” is from Creid. The album is an arranged soundtrack based on music from Xenogears.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Something mysterious. Something that reveals something greater, or at least leads to it. Something that feels different to the known. It shimmers and shines; it reveals light and structure, and structure does indeed form around it. Something specific starts sounding out in thin beams. Long, spindly beams flowing outward, drifting away.

When percussion, bass and vocals come in, the shape changes. There are guitar scrapes here and there, and the bass seems to heave whilst the percussion almost hesitates and steps resolutely in equal measure.

There’s a determination in the sounds. almost, and violin works its magic, moving back and forth, and eventually a moment of build comes, though it seems that many of the sounds become thinner, as though compressed. The vocals move to the centre, or rather they reveal themselves as in the centre and they layer and grow, and bloom as the percussion keeps a base under and around them.

And the vocals disappear for a moment whilst most of everything returns, and sound drifts and presses and gets stuck on itself and flows and flutters, and everything spreads out in the space. It’s almost as though there’s breathing for everything, and tone and atmosphere become key.

A focus on the vocals once more, and once more they disappear. Sounds continue the main structure, and vocals among other sounds return. They flicker like a flame, and they build and fall, and some sounds shine and twinkle, and slowly everything fades out and the song ends.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Joe Hisaishi: …and Alone

Posted on February 23, 2026 by Stupidity Hole

One listen, and with this one I struggled a bit. I was thinking too much again and I slowed down more than I should have. It led to the writing being far more brief than I’d have liked.

Joe Hisaishi’s (藤澤 守) “HANA-BI” is from Hana-Bi, the soundtrack for the Takeshi Kitano (北野 武) film, Hana-Bi.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Pressure dances and tiptoes, and strings stir and sweep. Keys play specific combinations, striking gently before spreading out a little, then compressing once more. The strings return and everything paints a dire image.

The sounds get heavier and more dire. They seem to swirl as a wind whipping up into a frenzy, and they build, then settle, then come into a fuller state when the beat appears. Or rather, they pull back long enough to give the beat prominence, but remain there, circling around.

Flow is established and the strings keep circling around. They rise once more to a point, then everything stops and the song ends.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment