Got a bit of work to do today so I’m gonna churn. I say that a lot, but I am churning at the moment. Got cleaning, got mowing, got other stuff; now churning. Now churning and getting a lot of words out and flying. Watching the breeze move the trees. How moving.

It’s a wild world out there and it’s full of the most boring shit you could ever imagine. It’s full of excitement, too. It’s full of lots of stuff you could see in one lifetime, and plenty you won’t. You gotta get out there to find out what you will and will not see. So is the way of things and so is the way it goes. And so on and so forth, and you get the idea.

What an introduction.

But I can see a breeze and I know it’s warm outside and there’s not much of anything I can do about that. I just need to keep on going and find where the everything lies. Find where everything sits and find where, among all the crap, the diamonds lie. Then I will discard the diamonds and admire the mud. You know; the way it goes here, because there is only one way to be about things and I will not hear any other way offered as that’s not what I want to indulge in. Too many other things I need to indulge.

I need to indulge my desire to produce silly fiction, and maybe some good fiction, too. I need to engage in a lot of things and I need to find nothingness and find how it shapes everything and nothing, and then I need to go from there. That seems like a bad idea. Could be a good idea. Only one way to find out.

I don’t want to think about the amount of words I’ve written as of yet, and I don’t know why I’m writing this. I guess what I’m writing is a bunch of disconnected thoughts again. How true to life and how true to this space. I shall keep on going, though I feel that it si not good as I should be more responsible. No wait, I shouldn’t; I made this time for myself and I’m gonna capitalise upon it. That’s what I’m gonna do as that’s what I need to do. Or I don’t, but I should.

I can feel that I am exhausted. I need more rest and rest will come. It won’t come right now, but it will come. Also, I’d much prefer to watch the breeze than write right now, but I also know that if I stop writing I won’t watch the breeze. I will be compelled into indecision and that’s not what I want right now. Right now I just want to force myself through what I am doing and then get on with the getting on. Get on with life and living, and get on with finding my way to wherever I may be. I guess where I will be is outside, in the car, giving the inside of the car a good clean whilst outside.

It’s a good day to do this though I should’ve started earlier. Still, I’m making progress. I’m making tracks. This is one step and there will be a few more to come, hopefully. Maybe today is the day where I churn everything out. I wonder. Maybe this will be when everything starts properly, and then once that is done and is the case, I’ll be good. I’ll be fine and I’ll just produce so much rubbish that I will finally feel like I am celebrating the end of this space. Maybe that’s what I need to do. Maybe that is what I will do.

Don’t think I’ll be able to keep it up, but I’ll try.

Or I won’t.

New sentence.

The people across the road will probably start blasting music soon. Don’t want them to, but they will. They do it here and there and it is aggravating, but there’s not much I can do about it. I could go over and tell them not to, or rather, ask them not to, and maybe they would actually stop. Unfortunately I have my doubts. This, however, does not matter. There are so many other, more important and pressing things to worry about and I’m gonna worry about those and not this. I don’t need to worry about this right now. It’s not even happening.

Maybe I could blast my music back at them. I could do that. Would be incredibly shitty of me, however, to do so, and so I don’t think I will do that. Besides which, there are so many other, more important things to worry about, that are also pressing, and I definitely did not say this a few sentences ago.

I think I should stop and get to it. I should get to the work of the house and the maintenance of the yard. I should find the brow on my sweat annoying and desire to stay fresh and refreshed, and that’s not gonna happen today. Too much nothing to get through and too much everything to get through. Who has time top consider the sweat of their brow when they are playing the eternal game of catching up to being merely a few months behind rather than a few years? Not me, that’s for sure.

I guess, however, in saying this, I know that being productive is good. Balance, balance, and not balancing. Finding balance; striking balance. Getting through things one step at a time, continuing on and then going on from there. That’s what I need to do. I need to get on with my life and that means chores need doing, so I’m gonna do them. Don’t wanna, but gotta. The way it all goes and it’s not really the worst thing in the world, despite my protesting.

So there was a point I was gonna make, but I forgot.

The time it took to write one thousand words: 10:37:30

Good speed; crap writing.

Written at home.