Starting the timer, playing some Talk Talk. It’s a day. Or not. Just another day of work, and a quiet one before tomorrow, which is another day of work.

Yesterday afternoon I went for a walk. It was quite hot but I still went. I wanted to start stretching my legs a bit more. You know, work on getting fit again, as there is a lot of work that I need to do… to get fit again.

I went outside, walked around the park. Came back quite sweaty, but it was worth it. It was worth going around and dealing with the heat. But it wasn’t the happiest of walks. Lots of thinking about how much time I’ve wasted, those kinds of things. Knew it was going to be that kind of walk, but still did it, still embraced it and still let myself dip for about thirty minutes for no reason. Could’ve just been an appreciating of the mobility I’m fortunate to have.

I wasted a lot of time during my break time, and sure, you don’t always get to do what you want when you’re resting. You don’t get to do what you want most of the time anyway, and that’s the way it is. But this was a time I wanted to do more, and needed to do more and it didn’t happen, so… yeah. What do I do about it, other than try to maximise my time as it is currently? Because that’s all I can do, really.

Tomorrow I will be driving once more, but I’ll be going for a walk when I get to work. Going to keep walking, going to keep relying less on the car wherever I can, because as convenient as it is, this urban driving is really taking it out of me and it’s more stress than it’s worth, I feel.

Years and years ago I wrote about how much time I was saving by cycling, and how much time everyone would save if they cycled more (obviously for those who can). I stand by that more now, and I do miss cycling a lot. I also miss being productive, but the only way those things are gonna happen is if I work on them happening, and I’m fortunate enough to be in a position where I can. If I don’t, nothing changes, so I’ve got to keep on doing it if I want the change.

But yeah; I walked, and I reflected, and I listened to some sad music. It was hot and I was sweating heavily, and people were out playing and enjoying their time in the park, and it was a nice bit of time spent. Sometimes you wish these things went on for longer, and sometimes you don’t, but that was the right amount of time. Would’ve been better had there been no heat to deal with, but I’m not complaining too much. It was just a good way to cap off an overdue work break.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 07:43:55

I wanted to try and write something a bit happier about the end of the break, and instead I wrote something that wasn’t quite about it. Oh well.

Written at home.