Yesterday I challenged myself to a little bit of worldbuilding and it spiraled away from what I was trying to do, time-wise, and it’s still going but that’s okay. Sometimes that happens. But I was hoping to have it done within a certain amount of time and that didn’t happen, and now I’m here writing about writing. Again.

Too many ideas, not enough time. So it goes and so it stands. Surprising. Or not. And so on and so forth.

But I need to sit down when at home more often and get these things done. Get them sorted out, get moving, get going, and get on with the getting on. Need to stop getting home and just not doing anything as it’s costing me too much and it takes so little to keep on going. But I also need sleep and I need a lot of things, and it’s the same for plenty out there, really.

When did the idea of living become so devoid of enjoyment of time? When did it become so much about being tired and doing very little? People will say stuff about how that’s adulthood, but having been an adult for long enough, I think that anyone who would say that in a manner of “deal with it”, has an intentionally shitty outlook. We should be able to enjoy our time more rather than less, and we should have more energy to do things, I think. But of course some of that comes down to looking after oneself better, and sometimes you do and sometimes you don’t.

But I have these ideas and not enough time, but I can start putting them onto the page more often, and I should. And I do. But I should also see them to completion and I’m definitely not doing that, and that’s not good. But I’ll get there.

Sometimes the best you can do is slowly chip away to build things up, and that’s not always great, but if you can’t do much else, you may as well do that. Better than flopping about, flailing one’s arms and not getting anywhere… though sometimes that, too, is warranted. Sometimes when you can sit there and do massive chunks, that’s what you have to do, so you take advantage of those moments, and you try to find a balance for it all and get everything done and slowly, but surely the pieces start fitting together and you get somewhere, even if it’s not to completion.

Completion will come eventually, however, if you go at it long enough.

Or rather, if I go at it long enough because I need to keep going and pushing on, and maybe I will get there, but I need to keep going. But I need to actually keep filling in the spots, and I need to finish this worldbuilding thing that’s starting off with one small space in a larger world of the mundane, and gradually things will reveal themselves as I keep going.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:46:29

Bit disjointed, but also more stream-of-consciousness than this stuff has been in a while, so I’m happy with that.

Written at work.