Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1518: All the Gunk Cleared

Doing another run through speed in order to see if I can get a thing written in a quick manner.

I have a plan for today and that plan is ‘get all the gunk cleared and see if I can actually, finally, write something of value’. For that to happen, I’m gonna churn out a lot of crap today. I’m also going to get back on track with working toward wrapping up the blog, because I had a plan and getting dumped was not part of that, and things have derailed so I need to get back on track with that. I need to get back to getting back to getting back, or something.

I feel as though I’ve been dislocated in space and time, in a sense. I feel I’ve been drifting aimlessly and not saying what I’ve wanted to say. I’ve a chance to do so, and what I want to say is… well, not much, really. But I’ve wanted to write things and I had a specific plan, and I think it’s now time to get back on track. I think I’m going to fall behind a bit and I might not be successful, but if I say what that plan is, then I know I won’t do it. So I’ve got to try and get back to that. I think I can, but I don’t know if I can. Only one way to find out, really.

So I’m sitting here and its cold and I’m trying to race forward. I feel like shit this morning, but I’m, going to do what I want to do. I’m going to push on, even if that means that my hands hurt from all the typing rapidly. Today is gonna be a day of crap; a day where I just produce nonsense, and I’ll get that done and then I’ll move forward. Maybe I’ll get some good done, too.

It will be interesting to see how the rest of the year unfold. I’ve about nine months before the end of the blog. Might be less, which means I’m going to have to do some really serious, intense rambling if I want to get everything done, but I think I can do it. I’ve done worse. I’ve done more intense things, though not over as long a period. But we’ll see. It’s always “We’ll see”, really, but we will. I will. Not sure if you will.

But I’ve got a day to conquer and a bit of writing to try and wrap u[p as quickly as I can. I’ve things I need to get done throughout today, and among that will be periods of rest. Need to rest as much as need to be productive. Things keep changing and swirling around, but I think I can see a point where maybe, just maybe, I’ll be okay and be able to achieve something. I hope I can. If not, I gave it a good go.

Just need to ride the next wave.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 05:26:89

Decent speed. Fast. Bit of meandering, but I got there in the end.

Written at home.

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Shiva Affect: The Bridge

One listen.

A bit of a struggle to write due to how tired I am at the moment, but I felt the need to get this done. The song has been quite appealing to me over the past few weeks and I felt I could write about it. Not sure if I did well, but I tried.

I was hoping to get more imagery and mood out but that’s not what came forward. Not entirely, anyway. Bits here and there, and the writing feels fragmentary overall.

Shiva Affect’s “The Bridge” is from Yahweh.

I hope you enjoy.

Descent on a guitar, and it fades. A rise, and percussion, and other strings become apparent. An arpeggio. Patterns forming, and bass comes in with a gentle force. Percussion begins to fill out more, the sounds fill out more.

This seems very much about sound, and could be a dark morning, or a dry day, or a slow afternoon. There’s something moody about it all as it all drifts on and finds its rhythm. Those earlier slow strums join the bass as it and the percussion become more full in a sense, stopping and starting and continuing on. The arpeggio seems to follow, seems to waver in and out, and seems more about its sound and texture than anything else.

More melody comes in, allowing a moment to be repeated until it rises and floats, seemingly fragile in a space quiet of activity. Everything then seems to peacefully descend.

Percussion pulls away and the two guitars are still lowering. Lowering, fragile, holding on a moment, and bass comes in, adding more breadth and drama. Once percussion returns things seem to pick up. Perhaps it is action or a strong wind, or something raging all around. It’s all peaceful and calm, but it all rages in a way. It rages with distance, builds and builds and folds into itself, and eventually lowers. Eventually it goes fully calm, but it feels like such a brief moment. It was there, firmly held, looking to grip, and it is gone.

And that lowering, that peaceful descent returns, decisive, seemingly alone, and okay at the song’s end.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1517: What I Tell Myself

What a few weeks it has been. What a time, and in time what a time.

Time.

I’m trying to get up and I’m staying down, and I’m needing to force myself to write. I need to force myself a lot at the moment, and I think it is in part due to fatigue, but the desire has left me. The desire to do much of anything is gone, but I need to keep on going. Time won’t wait, and neither should I in this instance.

That’s what I tell myself, anyway. I’m trying to find where everything is and what has happened, but I just don’t know anymore. I don’t know what will come tomorrow and I don’t know what I’ll do today. There are things that I will be doing, but those are necessary. This isn’t. That’s okay though. It’s okay to have unnecessary things in one’s life. Helps keep things going,

So I’m tired and currently I’m ill, and I feel trapped in a way. I have goals and ideas and I want to see them realised. I want to see a good few of them realsied before I wrap things up here, but maybe it’s not going to happen. Maybe things are going to drag on out, and I really don’t want that.

Maybe I’m just feeling sorry for myself at the moment. That I feel my life is getting further away from where I want to be even though I’ve more ability to get to where I want to go. The other possibility is that, in having some sense of relief in my life, other things are leaving me as perhaps they were coping mechanisms. I don’t know.

So I’m sitting here and I’m whinging about stuff that will probably come back, but I;m tired and I’m wondering, and I’m wondering if maybe I need to find new outlets and endeavours. I’m wondering about where my life is actually going. Is my life going anywhere?

Ah, I’m too tired for all of this. I should go outside, go for a walk. Stretch my legs a bit, take in some sun. This room is a cage and not great for light, and it’s not great. I survive and I’ll keep surviving, and I need to work my way back to doing what I want to do. I need to find my way again. Spent too much time flailing in the bushes. Not enough time dusting myself off and continuing on.

I wonder what would have happened had the last few months been different. I’m doing well, I’m doing great, but there are things that cast this feeling over everything, and that’s what I don’t like. I don’t like this feeling that things aren’t as good as they were, because they are better. Things are great. I’m the healthiest I’ve been in years. I’m getting fitter, and my injuries are hurting less. But without my ex in my life, it’s not as good as it could be.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 07:42:46

I feel as though I had to write this. Maybe I didn’t, but I had to get something down and this happened to be what I put onto screen.

Written at home.

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Hitomi Sato: Bicycle

One listen.

I am having to force myself to write at the moment, otherwise nothing is happening. This is hopefully the first step toward getting back into the swing of things. It’s not a good bit of writing, but it works.

Hitomi Sato’s (佐藤仁美) “Bicycle” (“じてんしゃ”) is from Nintendo DS Pokémon Black・White Super Music Collection, the soundtrack for Pokémon Black and White.

I hope you enjoy.

Percussion seems to bounce and soon a twinkle leads to other sounds coming in, also seeming to bounce. They seem to bounce and step quickly, and they’re looking for something and gaining momentum before they all fill out the space and glide toward wherever.

The sounds glide and flow and speed along. They move smooth and carry joy within then, They push hard and ease up, and follow contours of the terrain, and they keep on going. All is fun and upbeat; all is full of the joy of the ride.

The sounds continue on, moving through phases whilst maintaining their speed until they fade out at the song’s end.

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Heading Somewhere in the Sky

I took this photo within the last few weeks whilst at work. Great sunset, had to get a snap. Got a few, including this one. Not the best, but I like the contrast. I like how it servers as a reminder of how present human activity seems to be everywhere. Sometimes you just want to enjoy a good sunset and not think about that stuff, of course, but sometimes you want that reminder. I guess I did here.

I hope you enjoy.

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Stairs to Structure

Just a bit of a cold photo. Or maybe a warm photo. Or no temperature association at all.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. The next one is hosted by Margaret of From Pyrenees to Penines, and she has chosen “Colour Monochrome” as the theme.

This challenge is open to all, and I recommend joining in. If want to, check out more information about it here, and include the tag “monochrome-madness” when you share your photo. If you’d prefer not to join in, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography, and what other people submit.

I hope you enjoy.

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Foggy Goal

Gone from being tired to being sick, and this is one of the most annoying colds I’ve ever had, I think. As such, no writing again, and instead have another photo.

This one was in consideration for the recent Lens-Artists photo challenge, but something about it didn’t feel right. Something felt off and I couldn’t work it out, and I still can’t, but I do like how empty it feels.

I hope you enjoy.

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Rail Frame Invades the Space

For my recent challenge hosting, I had a particular idea for a photo which didn’t work, which is what you can see below. I didn’t take the photo quite the way I wanted to, or at least had considered and so the space in this doesn’t feel that appealing, I think.

I took another photo in this space and used that one instead and figured I wouldn’t use this at all, but I think this is worth sharing in terms of what not to do. I’m sure some people will like this, but it’s something to learn from and I appreciate it existing strictly for learning.

I hope you enjoy.

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Lens-Artists Challenge #356 – Quiet Hours

What are quiet hours? Among many things, this can mean an empty space. It can be a sense of stillness; a lack of action; an absence of presence within a frame. Quiet hours are often associated with the time before people are waking up and getting about, but it doesn’t have to be an area framed by darkness. They can be shown in many ways.

Waiting for Interaction

Here there’s a sense of quiet hours through a lack of presence. An area we’d normally associate with action through movement or human presence lacks it. It feels empty and there is no sound.

Quieting Fog

Weather phenomena can create a sense of quiet through isolation. Whilst the effect isn’t strong in this photo, the fog separates the area from some of its surrounds. It creates context for why this area might be quiet; along with the lack of people in the frame, the area is seemingly separated from surrounding space, and so it gains a stillness that suggests silence.

The Morning Drive

Quiet can be implied by what is leaving an area, such as a vehicle driving away from a camera. It’s not quiet now, but it soon will be. This can be a good way to create narrative. There is action, but it’s the action of moving through and away. The area is disturbed, but through suggestion we can accept an implication of quiet following not far behind.

Transmission Under a Darkening Sky

And of course, minimalism works quite well to represent quiet hours. Especially minimalism with open spaces with just the right kind of weather. Without the surrounding area providing context, there’s little to suggest how full of action this space will be. It could see very little human activity at any given time.

There are plenty of ways of showing quiet hours. It doesn’t have to be the absence of action, but it depends on the action. A scene does not need to be devoid of objects or subjects. As such, for the three hundred-and-fifty-sixth Lens-Artists Photo Challenge, I invite you to think about what makes for “Quiet Hours” to you. How do you see it in an image? How do you navigate the idea?

The host of the Lens-Artists challenges cycles weekly between the following people:

Tina

Patti

Ann-Christine aka Leya

John Steiner

Sofia Alves

Anne Sandler

Egídio

Ritva

Beth

This one is curated by me. Next week will be hosted by Egídio.

I recommend joining the community and participating in the challenges. They’re pretty straightforward, allow room for interpretation, and provide a good way to think about photography in general. If not, however, then at the very least you should check out what others submit to the challenges.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1516: First Gig in a While

Tomorrow I’ll be playing my first gig in almost six-and-a-half years. It has been far too long for my liking. Tomorrow it happens and I’ll go in, do my thing and then head off. Well, not head off, but leave the stage. We’ll see how it all goes. We’ll see what happens. How it happens. And all that.

Have I practised enough? No. Has Fe practised enough? No. There has been a lot of stuff going on, and so it goes, and so on and so forth. How it all happens. But we went in and we’re rusty and we’ll be rusty tomorrow, but we’ll get through it. We’ve been through worse.

I’m listening to one of the songs we’ll be playing tomorrow right now. I’m listening to it, trying to work out if I’ve got it all correct. Not sure if I do, but I might. Might do. Do might. I know we can play it and we’re both pretty familiar with it. It’s something we’ve played for years, though I do wish we were more rehearsed.

I don’t know if this is going to be one time or if it’ll lead to more. I hope it leads to more, but I don’t know. I never know. You never know with these things. I’m getting up in years and I’m not a young person anymore. But I’m sure that with enough rehearsing and practise, I could smoke anyone under the table. I could show them all how it’s done, and I know I could do that with Fe, and we’d be unstoppable. We wouldn’t go far, but we’d be legendary.

Probably not.

I just want to put on a good show, and I’m gonna try my best. No idea if I can, no idea if I will, but definitely going to try. Going to do my best. I want to feel music flowing, and I want to be in that moment. That moment where nothing matters and everything matters, and I am truly free. I am released and moving everywhere, and all is still and unmoving, and I am so firmly in the moment, but I am everywhere and nowhere all at once. I want to feel that sense of being alive again, and I want to flow freely. I want to feel music as it passes from my hands into the instrument, and from there though to the head, the cab and out as sound. Out as something tangible with a physical presence that is not seen, but felt.

I want to touch people again, and I don’t necessarily seek their adulation, but I seek to bring something to them, and I seek to have them feel something, to experience even a little bit of what I feel when I play.

But I also just want to put on a good show, and I hope that tomorrow I do. I hope that tomorrow I give the audience that good show, and I hope it’s one of many more.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:56:26

I wanted to get my thoughts about tomorrow down, and I did, and I wandered a little but it all feels relevant.

Written at home.

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