During conversation with my ex last week (Wednesday specifically), I sent her a bunch of anecdotes about some experiences I’ve had with toilets (except for the last two).

Sadly, she never received them.

I’ve decided to share them here because I find them humorous, despite how silly they are.

Maybe you will as well.

—

Last night I was on a toilet I had trouble getting off as the seat had very little grip. I slid on the toilet. I am serious.

I have sat on a toilet before.

One time I fell into a toilet.
Actually,  that has happened a few times…

There have been times I have sat on a toilet, only to find out the seat is detached.

I waa once on a toilet in five degree temperatures. It was refreshing.

I had a dream about being on a toilet once. It was a good toilet.

I have standed on a toilet. It achieved nothing, but I was taller for it.

I once thought I sat on a toilet. After sitting down, I realised it wasn’t a toilet but an echidna. It was a real pain in the ass.

If there is a lone toilet in the woods and it flushes without issue with no one around, does that mean the plumber did a good job?