Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1494: Okay for Now

Posted on April 26, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

So I’m already falling behind in what I wanted to achieve over the next year, but that’s okay for now. Right now I feel alright. I don’t feel too awful. I feel tired as, but I feel alright. There have been worse things I’ve experienced.

I’m taking a few minutes to decompress before I start the next thing and possibly lose a bunch of hours to chipping away at a work. Don’t know yet, but I’ll find out soon enough, I guess. Going to do a little bit more drawing. It’s what is coming to me at the moment and I have some ideas, so I need to get them done and down before I go on with whatever else next comes. A lot of work required – it always is – but it’s good learning and practise.

I used to do drawing a fair bit. Far more than ten years ago now. It sort of went by the wayside, but I’ve done it here and there, tried to get myself back into it and had some periods where I’ve kept going, and then dropped it again. Things come in cycles, and I have no idea why right now there’s a desire screaming at me to push hard into it, but I have to go with where I’m being led, and so that is what I’m doing.

There are a few short days left in this month and I intend to get quite a lot done between now and then. It’s going to be a rather herculean effort, as I need to start getting everything I own into boxes too. However, I’m going to try. After this rest I’m getting back into it, and I’m going to try and try and try some more. I’ll keep trying and I’ll keep on going, and then I can rest for a few days and then get back into it all again.

That’s all I really have to say at this point. I was up late last night and am feeling it right now, but I’m also feeling driven. It’s another wave and I need to ride it. Hopefully I can ride it all the way to where I want to be. I don’t know. I feel like things are going to be okay, but there’s still so much uncertainty. I’m still scared, but I’m kicking on. I’m continuing on with everything, because I need to. I need to for me, and I need to get back to a position in life where I can keep working toward living it. I’ve missed out on so much and right now my hand is forced, but I can get through this, and I can be productive, and I can keep on working toward improvement and being a better writer, or artist, or musician, or whatever else it is that I do, because I do a lot.

It’ll be interesting to see how much I improve by the time Stupidity Hole wraps up. I’m sure it’ll be enough.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:10:41

This was written sort of to unwind and sort of due to feeling as though I should. Not great. Not terrible, but not great.

Written at home.

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Meeting Ch’o Ryong

Posted on April 26, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

Soon after waking up this morning I saw the news that Good Old Games aka GOG have re-released Breath of Fire IV. I’m not sure what deals they made with Capcom for this to happen, but I’m glad it has.

I decided to put everything aside and draw Ch’o Ryong, the game’s grass dragon. Specifically, the scene in the game’s opening animation that involves her. I’d thought about doing this shortly after doing P’ung Ryong, but life and stuff.

This was started and finished today.

Edit: The frame that this is based off has some sparking trails running off of Ch’o Ryong, which I intended to add but clearly forgot about, so I’ve added those in and included that version below. I didn’t want to completely replace this one as I like the sense of minimalism that came through, but it didn’t feel right not completing the image.

I hope you enjoy.

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Venusaur

Posted on April 25, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

Started with Bulbasaur, then Ivysaur, and now Venusaur.

Tried to make this one cleaner, line-wise. Also tried to add a background that’s sort of meant to be a clifftop, but could probably be somewhere a bit boggier, or more humid.

Started this one on Wednesday and finished today.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1493: Couple of Days

Posted on April 25, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

Odd couple of days, it has been. Actually, it hasn’t, but some interesting moments.

Two days ago I had to walk over to another building on campus, just to make a delivery. I was feeling absolutely wretched. Just rough as everything. Was not pleasant. I’ve got the beard of sorrow going, and I can feel the sadness in my face.

I was walking along and it was a sunny day, and I was waiting for my lenses to transition because I didn’t want anyone to see my sadness, and it was taking too long. Just not great stuff. “Hurry up and change”, I thought to myself. Saw my reflection in a window. They had. They had changed. Could still see my sadness. In a way it was humorous though.

Yesterday, the confirmation of some things started coming in, and I begun to feel a little better about life. Only a little bit though. Can’t allow myself too much happiness. Wasn’t quite that way in the morning.

I woke up, got ready, threw on some clothes. There’s a shirt I have that I love and it’s made of good material. A few weeks ago I unfortunately got a really large food stain on it. Cleaned it up, threw the shirt in the wash. You know, usual stuff. Well unfortunately it still has this lengthy strip on it from where the food stained it, and I didn’t realise until it was too late. So I was at work with this shirt and its large stain, and my hair was dirty on account of really heavy sweating in my sleep, and I had this beard of sorrow and I just look trashy. There’s some skin peeling on my nose from a scab… just generally looking unpleasant.

Anyway, I I got through the day, and as I was leaving at the end of it I saw someone in the lobby. Decide to find out what they needed help with, so I asked. Got down the details, told them I’d take care of it on Monday. Was pretty loose and casual about it too because at that point I didn’t give a shit anymore.

Saw they had a band shirt of a band I knew, complimented them on the shirt. We started talking about stuff. Turns out they were a writer. We started talking about writing and it was just nice. It was pleasant. You know, I’m there and I look rough, and potentially hostile, and I’m talking to this person about writing, and it was just nice to have this conversation with a total stranger about something we’re both interested in. It was pleasant and easy, and words just came out. And I felt at ease. It was just a friendly conversation and it was about a shared passion.

We said our goodbyes and I walked to the car, and I felt energised. I felt relieved. I had this moment of happiness and excitement, and it came the whole way home with me, too.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 09:05:27

To be honest, I thought some of the humour of the first bit would’ve come through more. It didn’t, but at least I got across what I wanted to with the second.

Written at home.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1492: This Isn’t a Great Time

Posted on April 24, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

Still no new job and still facing homelessness. Looks like I’ll have a couch in the short-term, at least. That’s a good sign. That’s a relief. But it’s only time. It’s valuable time though, I need to be clear.

A while ago I thought I was at what was my lowest point then, and I told myself I would never let things get that bad ever again. Well, good intentions and all that. This just isn’t a good time and it’s not getting better. I mean, some aspects are, sure, but this just isn’t great. I’m getting too tired to keep doing this and it’s a struggle, but I need to keep going. I don’t have a choice.

I said recently that I didn’t want to be writing this way, and yet I am 9once more. I’ve said that a few times, actually, but it’s still what’s rising to the surface. It’s still what’s coming forward. What can I do, other than let it all happen? But it’s all so miserable and sad and unhappy, and it’s just putting all that misery out there. And I keep fighting and I keep struggling and little is changing, and I’m not in a position to just fuck off from everything because I’m too poor to be able to. So for now, it’s job application after job application after job application and hoping things change.

My ex, she has said that she doesn’t want to see me going through this. Yet she refuses to at least stay in our place until I’m back on my feet, thus reinforcing the issue. I get that she needs to do what she feels is necessary at this point, but it’s just a rough thing. That, along with other things makes me wonder if this is someone I can have in my life after all of this. Do I want to be dealing with someone who hasn’t had my back when I’ve needed them to have it? It’s not a new issue.

I also really don’t want to be talking about her, but here I am talking about her. Not in this space, anyway. I just want to be able to write and get some success from writing. I don’t want to be doing diary stuff, and that’s what I’m doing. I keep on doing it and it keeps on happening and everything is going on forever.

This is all a long, slow fall and I’m not sure if I’m gonna be caught in time. But there is time, and even through all of this despair there is chance. There is possibility for things to turn around, but it’s taking a lot and it keeps on going. But I also keep on going, in part because I have no choice and…

See? I’ve said all this stuff already and I’m saying it again! It’s like the whole thing is on repeat and the words keep on coming up in the same order. This isn’t a great time.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 07:32:03

I wrote this before work started and had to put it to the side to start work. Funny how that happens. Anyway, I was not in a good state this morning. Things have sort of turned around, but I’ll get into that tomorrow.

Written at work.

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Mysterious Structure

Posted on April 23, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

I think this may have been a cafe of some sort. I have no idea. I walked past it a few times, took some photos of it. It might still be where it is; I have no idea as I don’t pay any attention to it, generally. Just one morning I noticed it and it was bright.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. The next one is hosted by Margaret of From Pyrenees to Penines and she has chosen “Mirror” as her theme.

This photo was taken in spring, though it doesn’t feel much like a spring photo.

This challenge is open to all, and I recommend joining in. If want to, check out more information about it here, and include the tag “monochrome-madness” when you share your photo. If you’d prefer not to join in, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography, and what other people submit.

I hope you enjoy.

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Ivysaur

Posted on April 22, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

So it’s the second pokemon, ivysaur.

This one probably didn’t take too much time, but it felt like it did. After the initial sketching I decided to draw some more solid lines to cut down on the amount of erasing and redrawing I’d have to do. That was a fairly straightforward process, thankfully, but it felt like it took a while. It also led to me discovering that for part of this, I’d used the wrong type of line and fixing it would’ve taken a while. I might one day, but for now I’m wearing the mistake.

I kept the colouring simple again, just to keep things easy on me. It’s another thing I might adjust at some point, but right now it’s more about doing what I can.

This was started on Sunday and finished today.

I hope you enjoy.

 

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Hitomi Sato: Route 12 (Autumn/Winter)

Posted on April 22, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

A lot of the main Pokémon games’ soundtracks are quite beloved, and for good reason. They’re composed appropriately and don’t offer more than necessary, but also appeal when removed from the context of the games. I think that in particular, for this soundtrack Hitomi Sato (佐藤仁美) put in some excellent work. What she did is incredibly fitting constantly. It’s just wonderful.

With this one I tried to draw more on the sense of adventure. I feel I should’ve tried to draw more on exploration as I feel that what I’ve written merely touches on the surface when there’s so much to draw from.

Hitomi Satos’  “Route 12 (Autumn/Winter)” (“１２番道路 (秋～冬)”) is from Nintendo DS Pokémon Black・White Super Music Collection, the soundtrack for Pokémon Black and White.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Another day, another adventure. The world calls out and there’s so much to see. It’s dramatic, yes, but it’s wonderful. It’s wondrous. Over hills and down in valleys, and water flows on a fresh day.

There are challenges, sure, but there are successes. There is a lot to see and learn, and it takes a lot but moving forward is still desired. So much will be missed if stopping here, and there is no desire to stop anyway. Things don’t stop, and neither does the journey. It continues among the verdant landscape, and it continues as the sounds fade and the song ends.

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Hitomi Sato: Abyssal Ruins

Posted on April 22, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

Got a fair bit out with this one and I’m kind of surprised. I don’t think I did well enough to paint the scene. Was kind of doing so at the start, then veered away hard.

Hitomi Satos’ (佐藤仁美) “Abyssal Ruins” (“海底遺跡”) is from Nintendo DS Pokémon Black・White Super Music Collection, the soundtrack for Pokémon Black and White.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Shimmering percussion and strings of light come in through from above the surface. More percussion frames the space, and the strings lower. More come in, adding more shape, and things seem to settle before changing form.

The percussion rattles and echoes out, and another instrument comes in, fluttering and moving with the strings, or moving in steps alongside them. Sounds settle, the strings create some ominousness. They create a murk, and all seems darkened. Sounds return to flow and moving with each other, and mystery comes forward. Then some of it lightens up, if only for a moment. There’s still that murk, and perhaps some menace. Some uncertainty, but it’s a little lighter for the moment.

Eventually that full tension comes through again and it draws long. It draws heavy and reinforces, but it once again is countered when more instrumentation returns and adds that minor sense of adventure all the way through to the sounds fading at the song’s end.

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Hitomi Sato: Undella Town (Autumn/Winter/Spring)

Posted on April 22, 2025 by Stupidity Hole

One listen.

There’s a few more to come this morning. I queued up some tracks yesterday to write about, but yesterday ended up being a train wreck so I’m doing them now before work.

A pretty calm track and once more I tried to capture that. Not sure how well I did. I feel like I started something and then put it down, in a sense. Not far enough.

Hitomi Satos’ (佐藤仁美) “Undella Town (Autumn/Winter/Spring)” (“サザナミタウン (秋～春)”) is from Nintendo DS Pokémon Black・White Super Music Collection, the soundtrack for Pokémon Black and White.

I hope you enjoy

—

Waves lapping at a shoreline and percussion comes in, some of it sparkling, some of it just gently lapping at the sand. Low, and quiet. Strings off in the distance, emphasising. Keeping a light subtlety until more of them rise up. Seems to be asking about rest; about taking it easy; about enjoying the moment, for how brief it may be.

With the space provided the sounds linger beyond their patterns and beyond their ends. It’s time to think and reflect, and time to enjoy the space. It’s time provided to appreciate the moment.

There is, perhaps, some sadness among it all. Looking out beyond the shoreline, appreciating the calm and quiet, and soon it all fades out and the song ends.

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