Stupidity Hole

Chickens. They are numerous and many. There are more chickens in the world than there are people. I’ve read that there’s somewhere around fifty billion chickens. The information I read probably said “more than”, which is something that I imagine is actually the case.

Anyway, there are a lot of chickens in the world. More than there are people and their population is increasing much faster than that of the human population, it seems.

People may eventually become extinct. There is always a chance that we may somehow survive all the distastes that befall us, but it is likely that we won’t. Things do eventually have to fade and pass on, although plenty of things do live through history.

Once people become extinct, or perhaps a minor species on this wonderfully beautiful and majestic planet of ours, it is likely that the dominant species will become chickens.

This may seem ridiculous, but it is something that needs serious consideration. After all, in knowing this, perhaps we may be able to pass on information that will allow them to take the reins of the future into their claws and keep the cart on track instead of falling into the ravine below.

So what will happen is that people will disappear somehow. At this point the amount of chickens will be ridiculous levels. Once people are gone, chickens will gradually work out how to keep themselves alive over a few years. It is likely that domestication is in their instincts as it is continually reinforced. They will be able to break out of their prisons in time but still stick to the areas they know for fear of exploring the unknown. However, as they breed, eventually they will be forced to expand and push out of familiar territory.

Some urban chickens will begin exploring sooner than other creatures due to them only having access to small, mostly quiet areas.

It would not be more until after a few years that they start discovering larger human establishments and start spreading their way into these areas.

Of course with people gone other species would also thrive.
However, due to the sheer number of chickens, they would unintentionally take over due to the surprise of the novelty.

Of course it is unlikely that they would be vicious as most chickens seem to want to be more passive than they do aggressive.

Now it has been argued that the population of the predators of the chickens would also increase with the population of the chickens. However, this is highly unlikely due to the sheer volume of chickens in the world. They would find a way to defend themselves due to the size of their numbers and whilst they would probably lose a few here and there on occasion, a predator can only take so much chicken in one go and it would end up being a slow and eventually costly process.

The argument that was put forward was this:

“Let us say that there are chickens on a peninsula. Their population would eventually grow so much that there would be no more room for them to continue to spread as they would eventually reach a point where they wouldn’t be able to get past foxes that would be waiting for them.”

This is a good argument, but there are things that need to be taken into consideration. For instance, many of the chickens would become arboreal and defend the chickens of the earth from any attempts at mass chicken consumption. Furthermore, they would also allow the chickens to spread around the predators, or force them away as the populations continued to grow.

Another thing to take into consideration is that it would be likely that they would reach cities and park lands well before any predators and be able to defend themselves much easier.

There is a large parkland called the Centennial Park Lands in Sydney.

It is likely that in a post-human world, the chickens would eventually come to inhabit these huge swathes of  park. It might be cold in winter, but they would be able to stay warm by forming some sort of mass huddle and keep warm through body heat being continuously exchanged.

there could come a point where they would need to spread out and would probably slow a bit in breeding, but it would be a long time before that would happen. There would be great chicken communities.

Predators would eventually discover the location, but by then it would be too late. They would try to attack, but they would be engulfed by the advancing wall of chicken that would be unstoppable in its force of direction and sharpness of thousand-beak bawking.

The chickens would spread to new areas, form higher-functioning societies and eventually explore the world. However, they would always remain peaceful and not likely come to resemble something close to what we consider as modern civilisation. There would be a civilisation full of feathers and clucking, with much pecking mixed in for good measure.

Now this might seem a little far-fetched and unfathomable in scope, but the thing is this is something that should be seriously considered. It’s not something that is necessarily detrimental to us, but it could end up being detrimental to the chickens themselves as there would be an overabundance of chickens in the world. It could upset the balance of things, such as less available food on and in the ground for other creatures. The chickens my not realise this, or they may realise too late. However, chickens are probably much wiser than us. Whilst their populations would explode quite quickly, they would know when to stop breeding too much so as to not upset the way of things.

Chickens will most likely take over the earth and have a safe journey to their throne in the animal kingdom. To them, we must allow the earth to be as pristine as possible so that they have a peaceful and safe journey to their feathery future.

The time it took to write one thousand words: 21:24:92

Slower than I had hoped.

This was based off of a conversation that I head with a university colleague.

I thought I would extend it to something more pointless than the initial conversation.

Written at university.