Losing Face

This was taken around the same time as these two photos.
Just playing around with quickly turning my head.
The photo didn’t work as well as I’d hoped due to how the blur was captured. However, when I came back to it the day after I first processed it and being more aggressive with adjustments the below came out and I feel the result works a bit better.

I feel the image is a little uncomfortable in a way. It probably isn’t but it’s how it feels to me. There’s a sense of loss of identity on the individual level, I think, or maybe a sense of masking. An eye still comes through, however. Maybe it speaks of something that remains beneath it all. Who knows?

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. Participating is pretty straightforward and something I recommend. If you do, then include the tag “monochrome-madness” in your post.
If not participating, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography as well as what other people submit.

A lot of what people are submitting will likely end up here.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1228: Pumping Crap

Alright, it is time to have an hour of power, though there will be a brief bathroom break as a break is coming up soon and it requires use of the bathroom. Funny how these things happen.

I’m gonna push on through and write a whole load of crap as that is something worth pursuing. There isn’t enough crap out there and so there needs to be more. Need to be really pumping it out and making sure that there is no escaping the deluge of sentences that provide nothing comprised of words chosen on the fly. This is how it all goes down and so it is going to go down, and in that way in particular.

Where to go from here? Ah yes, that way!

So anyway, I think that the sun is nice sometimes and what is also nice are the trees outside and a few other things, but I’m worried that they might all combine and become some sort of transforming organism that transforms between a structure that appears humanoid and a structure that appears vehicular. This worry is not founded on anything based in reality other than a series of thoughts but it could happen. It could happen today. If it does, then what?

There’d be little I could do about it. There’d be little you could do about it. This is not something you’d want to set on fire because it wouldn’t work very well as all the things would probably be fireproof if they can combine with the sun.

Alright, so if I use a lot of water then perhaps that will solve the problem. Then again, I’m fairly certain that the trees in this area use water to assist in growing, so maybe that will make them grow faster.

Maybe it’s just snow. I just need a lot of snow and I’ll throw the snow at this thing and then that will solve the issue. But at what cost?

Anyway, what I’m saying is that this is a situation of unprecedented danger and I need to get through it somehow, but I’ve no idea as to how. I don’t know what you do when you get this thing that transforms from a vehicle to a humanoid shape. I don’t know what to do and it’s just gonna destroy everything, unless it doesn’t. Maybe this new god-like being will be a benevolent ruler and we’ll all be led down a path of prosperity and all will be good and peace will finally be achieved. However, there is a good chance that other places will want their own and then it becomes a new arms race and I’m getting sick and tired of those.

We need to race with legs and not arms. Racing with arms is tiring and… well, maybe we need both but that’s not important right now. What is important is that I’m worried this transforming thing will create a bit of hassle and that’s something that I’d much rather avoid.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 05:51:76

Been on my break, kind of commencing properly now. Kind of.

Anyway, this is a wonderful bit of silliness.

Written at home.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1227: Stopped by Rain

So I was getting ready to head out as there’s stuff I want to do and I want to also stretch my legs. I was ready, I headed to the door and suddenly the rain fell and now I’m here writing about it, as though it is anything to write about. Right now I’m just looking to kill time so maybe killing time doing this is helpful, or something. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll never know. However, I do know that I’m going to keep on writing this until it’s done and hope that the rain has died down enough for me to be able to head on out and do the things and all that stuff.

It’s interesting that this has happened, though maybe it isn’t. It’s just life. It seems like it’s fateful, or at least if I were to postulate in an odd direction, I’d say it is fateful. I’d say that something is trying to tell me something, but I’m not going to say that as I know that that isn’t the case. I do know, however, that I am slightly annoyed by the happening as it means I leave later rather than sooner and I’d rather leave sooner rather than later, but sometimes that’s the way things go. Sometimes you get stopped in your going about things and so you just deal with it, so long as there is the space to deal with it, of course.

There are far worse things that I could be dealing with right now, though admittedly when I leave the house I will be dealing with something pretty serious. Still, it is something that will hopefully see itself nipped in the bud pretty quickly, though of course these things have a way of dragging themselves out in a rather nasty and unpleasant way. In any event, a serious call will be made and then a tribunal booking will occur and then hopefully some rather overdue compensation will be paid.

The rain is slowing down and I sit here and air some dirty laundry in a rather vague way. I’ve said nothing and so nothing has been said. It’s not always a good way to go about things, but sometimes you feel you have to in order to at least get something across. Could be worse; always can be, but could be better. Still, the rain is nice, as is the sound of birds signifying a bit of a rest, and so in knowing that it’s probably time for me to get up and go and get on with the walking as there is a lot of walking to do and there are very few days in which to do said walking. There is a bit of going out and seeing things and taking some photos and I should probably get to that as soon as I stop writing, which I will.

Then again, maybe I won’t. The rain may strike once more. Maybe it is some sort of sign.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:50:85

A bit more seriousness in this than I would have liked.

Written at home.

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A Poem About a Summer Storm

The first two lines were scribbled out yesterday.
The second two just now.
In the hands of a better writer I think the imagery in this would be more effective.
That said, I think I did alright here.

I hope you enjoy.

A roar reverberates through the dark
Among it a pitter-patter upon the paths
Spaces of light are drowned out by noise
As are summer’s evening sounds

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1226: Burn Out Respite

There is a time and a place for everything and sometimes that is something that is not available. Ergo, sometimes you have to create the time and place for everything, but there is no telling and all that other stuff so you know how it goes and so on and so forth and slowly the spiral is returning and so it is time to get away from the spiral.

Just need to walk off the spiral and onto whatever it is that I can claim I can walk onto. Perhaps it is a stage and with that stage there is a chance to perform, but the performance must contain honesty. It must contain integrity. If it does not, then who am I to say that I really performed?

Perhaps there is no performance and there is no time and place for everything, but I do know that there is always room to try. It is good to try and it is good to try and go somewhere. It is good to work hard, but it is also good to not burn out. Perhaps creating a time and place for everything would also allow for the creation of a time and place for recovering from burning out, but at the same time there is a good chance that in doing this you’d burn out well before you’d get to the point where you’d have a place to recover from burning out and so maybe that is what should be created first.

Starting with a place to rest and then creating everything else so that all and everything is accommodated for would be the best way to go about things, but then again the order needs to still be considered and perhaps more time would be spent recovering from burn out than getting anything done and maybe this just isn’t a good idea at all. However, smaller goals are something to work toward and so… yeah.

You know, I wasn’t aiming to write something that could be seen as some sort of advice and was hoping for something much more silly and loose. It didn’t happen and now I have this, but really the best advice I can offer, at least at this particular juncture, is to make sure you are in a position to help others before you help others. Burning out and not being in the right space to make sure that you yourself are okay doesn’t help you help others, and continuously pushing through that kind of things can lead to some pretty undesirable impacts to your health. You have to make sure that you’re okay.

I think that not enough people look after each other for fear of selfishness and its unfortunate. We are allowed to look after ourselves, especially when it’s necessary. We just need to also make sure that we are helping each other without overextending.

Well, with that being said, I think it’s time to end this bit of writing as I’ve not much else.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 08:08:58

A bit of a mess before I hit a topic. Definitely could’ve been better in a few places.

Written at home.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1225: No Respite in This Heat

Tired. Hot. Lack of sleep. Hot day. These are not related. However, if I say them over and over enough times, I think I might discover something new.

I don’t need to do this to myself during summer but at the very least summer is nearly over and soon there will be some sort of relief, or at least a sense of relief that will not be earned but appreciated regardless. It’s gonna be a time to celebrate and the celebrating will be done through a vigorous round of not doing very much.

Perhaps there will be some slithering.

Anyway, right now I have to deal with this situation that I find myself in so of course I am howling and cursing in pain and terror and all those other things. This is terror incarnate. There is no torture worse than what I am currently experiencing so I flail in a void of darkness, not knowing if I am on the ground, floating or falling. I know not what anything is anymore, but the pain and torment remain and so I try to sluggishly crawl my way out of this space of destitution, not knowing if I am going anywhere.

I keep on trying to get out of this and it continues on for eternities upon eternities It just keeps on going and it is nothing more than a series of jokes at my expense. I am sweating and I am barely moving, and I am in a position where I must stay awake but feel a strong desire to go sleep for a while, but I cannot. I must continue to suffer in solitude and all this suffering is diminishing character.

Of course I could just go to the exit door and use that and then have a nap or something, and there is a fan, but that would be easy. That would take away all the drama of this writing and my ability to really put it on as these would provide some sort of relief and if I am to take the option of relief, then there is no turning back for me. There is no ability to come back from a brief respite and so I have no idea what I’ll do from there. I have no idea if I dare take away something that so enables me to go on at length about things that don’t matter that much in the grand scheme of things.

Anyway, the pain, the discomfort, the horror and the terror! All howl at me as the wind blows dry and dull across a decaying sky, and I am here, hearing the sound of summer outside which provides some sort of pleasing sensation, if only the heat were not here to pull upon my very soul. I am afforded no rest despite a deep desire to, and I continue to endure the thousand insults that are thrown my way by this weather. It is unjust and unfair, and it’s also unpleasant.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:40:46

This was fun to write. It’s not good, but it was fun.

Written at home.

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Sewing Buttons

Recently my partner was commissioned to make a crocheted doll.
On one of the days she was working on the doll I took a few photos of her hands. I wanted to capture some hand-based work and so what she was doing fit that well enough.

This is my submission into the two hundred-and-thirty-seventh Lens-Artists Photo Challenge. The theme for this one is “Bringing Softness“.

All of the soft focus here is unintentional, and sewing is not often a soft process, though it can be, depending on what is being done. Anyway, I think that the unintentional soft focus in parts of this photo makes it fit the challenge.

The host of the Lens-Artists challenges cycles weekly between the following people:

Week 1 – Tina

Week 2 – Patti

Week 3 – Ann-Christine aka Leya

Week 4 – Amy

Week 5 – John Steiner

Week 6 – Sofia Alves

Week 7 – Anne Sandler

Week 8 – Guest host

Donna of Wind Kisses joined the Lens-artists team this year. It will be good to see how we can interpret her challenges.

Bren of Brashley Photography is guest-curating this one. The next one is Leya.

I recommend participating in the challenges. They’re open enough to allow for a fair bit of thinking about approach and closed enough to keep focus on meeting the theme of each one. If you don’t participate, you should still check out what others of the Lens-Artists community are submitting.

I hope you enjoy.

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Looming Shadow

One last photo of this skull and flower combination. This is a bit closer to the angle I was trying to get with it and its shadow. It’s not quite what I was hoping for, but I like the combination anyway. It feels a bit off and kind of uncomfortable, though that has a lot to do with the angle, I think.

I hope you enjoy.

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Red Flowers in a Skull

More skull flowers, though this time moodier. Perhaps also with more dread. This was taken by covering and holding the bike torch in a particular way. When I took the photo I thought the only thing that would be visible would be the flowers. The skull vase being slightly visible is a happy accident.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. Participating is pretty straightforward and something I recommend. If you do, then include the tag “monochrome-madness” in your post.
If not participating, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography as well as what other people submit.

A lot of what people are submitting will likely end up here.

I hope you enjoy.

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Big Dead: Former Self

This one took a while to finish, in part due to procrastination, in part due to another lengthy block. I churned out a draft pretty quickly. I think it took an hour, maybe two. Then time passed and I started chipping away last week before sitting down and editing the majority for a few hours yesterday.

I think the result reads mostly okay as it says a bit about the music without much waffling. It is a bit rough in places but it is a significant improvement over the draft, as it should be really as the draft was really rough.

Most of my interview and review work now appears on Culture Eater.
My colleague and I set up a Patreon to further develop Culture Eater as a source of good quality arts coverage from both ourselves and our contributors.

We’re looking at what we can give to supporters as we don’t want to set up a one way relationship, so suggestions are welcome. Podcast Eater is one of the things we’ve got going and (aside from the next few weeks) new episodes are available through there first.

Please consider supporting, or at least sharing the Patreon page with others. Please also check out what our wonderful contributors are contributing.

I hope you enjoy.

Keys gently shimmer; percussion soon rolls in and woodwind floats around. A slight cymbal strike, more instrumentation comes in and “Tide/Microscopic” becomes this cinematic, lively and gentle thing. It’s a good taste of things to come.

The energy dissipates and Big Dead move into a state of quietude. Vocals find their way in, almost wafting off the instrumentation. The words they use are close but vague, almost as though they are suggestive blurs. They move through a space the group could completely consume, but wisely don’t.

Eventually the words gain clarity; they coast along the sounds as everything starts to build. Big Dead reach upward and outward and allow themselves grow through intensity. Even as “Tide/Microscopic” continues unfurling it remains peaceful, and rather going for an explosion at the end all the build suddenly stops just before the final word sung.

“Mary”, Former Self‘s midpoint, continues the flow with an airier feel. The percussion flutters and flickers whilst sounds drift upon its current. The vocals follow in a similar vein; they seem less anchored, but they still follow closely.

Gradually the song shifts whilst retaining a sense of familiarity; The rhythm remains deft whilst the instrumentation grows more textural and vivid. All is in unison and traveling well, and all gradually build to a calming climax. Once there Big Dead sound focused and sharp and ride out the moment to its natural conclusion. It’s something that feels massively small, and it’s rather pretty.

Former Self‘s “Former Self” is probably its most active song. It’s also probably its most “song-like”, and the least with a sense of atmosphere and the cinematic. Maybe that’s due to how grounded its instrumentation feels. It still inhabits the same world as the prior-two songs, but the percussion sounds much firmer, as though it is anchoring everything. The other instruments still drift but they’re less flowing, so to speak. It’s as though Big Dead are going for a walk rather than daydreaming or floating away through idyllic scenery.

The vocals feature mainly in the song’s first half where they move alongside the instrumentation, though with a slightly different step. Through their deceptive drawl they carry a sense of space; there’s room for everything to do what it needs. The vocals also form a sense of continuation with the instruments. They feel almost one and the same – at least thematically – and meld into each other quite well.

Eventually “Former Self” sees Big Dead expand outward once more and start bringing the EP to its end. A brief pause for the vocals to resume and then the group go massive. Sounds roar and congeal into a beautiful release of expression; There’s a sense of sadness to it, but it’s also uplifting. It’s conclusive and cathartic, and furthers the song without diminishing its start.

Former Self feels relaxed whilst remaining tight and lively; It’s clear that Big Dead put a lot of care into how everything works together. Sounds congeal and change, and vocals find a place that doesn’t take away from the instrumentation. The result is a wonderful tapestry of sound that is as dynamic and expressive as necessary.

Former Self is available here.

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