And so it begins.

What is it that begins?

It’s it. Or something. I am yet to decide.

I sit here. I am cold. I read the words that I write, but only briefly as I am not paying attention. Outside it is dark and in the darkness this bit of world seems contained and on its lonesome. It seems to have detached from everything else and there is nothing else out there. All I can see is all that exists and now this is in some pocket dimension removed from reality.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I should try and return to the real world. I don’t know if I should leave this room. IS there anything that I can visit, or is this really all there is? I do not know and I don’t want to try and find out. However, there might just come a point where I have to try and find out as I can’t stay in this room forever. Besides which, there has to be more than what I am seeing. There has to be a world beyond the view I have. There needs to be, but what if there is not?

What if this really is all there is and I’m just deluding myself into believing that there could be more? What if I am truly isolated from everything and I can’t do much, if anything about all of this?

I don’t know what I can do, but I do know that sitting here and ruminating on the lack of existence of what used to lie beyond what I can se from my window is not going to solve the issues. Sure, I might be able to think about it and I may be able to think philosophically, but that does not change the fact that I am not doing anything about it and therefore I need to do something about it and not keep sitting here and doing thing, lest I lose more of the world that was once around me.

There still remain a lot of questions that I feel are important to ask. There remain a lot of answers that must be sought and there are a lot of hills to climb, but I am not sure if those are things that are worth entertaining right now. They can be answered on the journey, assuming the journey lasts any longer than a few minutes at best. However, that also is not something that I shall worry about right now.

Now that I think about it, I will not do anything. The world can come back to me; it left and so it is its responsibility to return. Why should I chase after it? I have better things to do with my time and if it is going to up and disappear without warning, then I shouldn’t be lured into kowtowing to its whims. Instead of going anywhere, I will sit here and do very little.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 05:40:91

Whilst probably already heavily explored, this could’ve been a fun philosophical thought experiment. Instead of that I went into silliness, but I’m okay with that right now as, whilst this is a mess, it still has coherence to it and that’s an improvement over some of my recent rambling.

Written at home.