Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1196: Full Steam Ahead

Alright, it’s time to be alive.

Still tired, still punching on. No overly long rambling about being tired and other things today, though maybe there will be, assuming that I change my mind. However, right now I am not changing my mind and instead steaming myself so as to be able to make the claim that I am indeed moving full steam ahead.

Maybe I’m moving full steam behind, but I am yet to work that out and so for now it is full steam ahead. I don’t have a steam engine but I am steaming myself in a strict non-literal sense, though I wonder how badly it would go if I did indeed steam myself.

Would I steam myself with a steam machine? Maybe that would be the best way to go. Really hot steam and use it to clean myself. I know that that would be highly inefficient, but sometimes you gotta live and try and do these things. You gotta go ahead and try and live a little and experiment and experience things you would not normally experience, and really, what better way to do so than through the power of a machine that steams?

Maybe it would be better to just set up about fifteen kettles and then steam myself that way. I wonder as to how that would turn out. Surely it would not be very efficient, but perhaps it would be better than the previous option that I mentioned, and if it is, well then, I guess I’m set for being on top of things, or something.

Maybe I’ve thought about this far too much and need to retrace my steps and work out the meaning of what I am saying. There are implications from the results and I should try and weigh and consider those as they may hold sway here and if they do, then perhaps I need to just trash the whole thing altogether.

Now that I think about it a little bit more, maybe it is not me being steamed, but it is me steaming the things and so there is no ahead or behind, but only purely being on the spot and I steam the spot for there is nothing else that can do any steaming and so I’m now feeling pumped about the whole thing, really.

Actually, no I’m not. I’m not feeling pumped and I’m not feeling good about it at all as now I’m realising all the work that I need to put into doing anything and that’s not something that I want to do. I want to just sit here and let myself boil for a while and not worry about the steaming. I am not an engine and I am not some sort of punk and so it’s just easier to be much like the person that I am and just go from there. Much easier, but also I’ll take the boiling, but only if no steam at all is not an available option.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 05:54:44

Not sure what I was doing here, but I feel that, in hindsight, this would’ve worked better as an attempt to deconstruct the phrase “Full steam ahead”.

Written at home.

About Stupidity Hole

I'm some guy that does stuff. Hoping to one day fill the internet with enough insane ramblings to impress a cannibal rat ship. I do more than I probably should. I have a page called MS Paint Masterpieces that you may be interested in checking out. I also co-run Culture Eater, an online zine for covering the arts among other things. We're on Patreon!
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