Partially Enclosed

Another photo from when my partner and I took photos with fabric (the other one is here).
This one is a little less dramatic I think. It feels more low-key, or perhaps it’s just a slight breather before a grand display.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. Participating is pretty straightforward and something I recommend. If you do, then include the tag “monochrome-madness” in your post. If not participating, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography as well as what other people submit.

A lot of what people are submitting will likely end up here.

I hope you enjoy.

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Bark Psychosis: Absent Friend

One listen but rewound in some parts.

I think this is okay. I spent too much time trying to describe the song and doing so in a clumsy way. I feel like toward the end my writing improved by a significant amount, but perhaps it was too late.

Bark Psychosis’ “Absent Friend” is from Hex.

I hope you enjoy.

A low ring along with a steady beat. Guitar seems to lazily drift on and around whilst something that sounds like accordion rises and falls with a kind of yearning. Vocals approach and the whole form changes whilst keeping similarity. There’s a softness in the words as bass now moves up and down, seemingly slipping in and out. Guitar rings out in places and keys seemingly do the same.

A moment that seems like it’s meant to be large comes in quiet and carries something fond. Perhaps it is reminiscence and in the space it allows guitar floats more than earlier. Bass comes in and draws a little slower and longer, and percussion remains steady.

Low brass appears, or at least what sounds like brass, for it could also be guitar. It is low and seems almost disassembled. Vocals are there as though in a tube now, and various sounds appear at the edges and come in as the bass moves up and down and the percussion remains steady, but then it all stops and that accordion sound returns, draws long.n Other sounds touch on parts of the melody, and guitar returns to its drifting.

A tenderness comes in through the minimalism and through the sounds keeping their carefulness dreaming grows long in all directions and things just seem to float away. The yearning and fondness is there, and maybe there’s a closing there somewhere once the percussion ends. The guitar continues on and something seems to hit hard; not with aggression, but it’s just a hard hit that sinks into the chest, and the idea of scenes flicker on by as this happens. Memories are there in order and yet still feel scattered, but they are there and they make sense and they hold something special. They are, of course the past and they are a series that has to come to an end but for now, on every note and every sound that rises in and hums in a high pitch they unending.

They are as present as they are past, but of course memories change over time. We remember some of the details but ever so slightly the events around them may shift, and how we remember them too, but the longing and fondness remains. They remain as vibraphone comes in and all fades out, and they too stop at the song’s end.

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Shading

Another of the hand reference shots I took but ended up not using.
I’m fairly certain that this one was less about reference and more about how it appeared with the light contrast. Not anything particularly interesting, but I do like how the shadow removes some of my hand.

I think I’ll try redoing this at some point, see if I can draw out stronger contrasts. Not sure.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1284: Scrapped the Start and Restarted

So I started this off in a way that was far too familiar to me and so I scrapped the start of this bit of writing. Admittedly I did not lose many words but it still feels like a large wipe for some reason. Maybe I’m just thinking about it in the wrong way. Maybe I’m not, but maybe I am. Not sure and probably won’t work it out but sometimes it is good to ponder and all that other stuff.

I wanted to get a start on things a bit earlier today but was unable to do so for reasons and so now I’m starting now. It’s a bit late in the evening – I’d much rather be winding down at the moment – but I think I’ll get to the end of this and then toward the next thing… assuming I don’t decide to start again again.

I wonder what would’ve happened had I followed those words I’d typed out before I removed them from this space. I wonder how the writing would’ve turned out. Quite possibly better than this, but also quite possibly worse. I’ve chosen to go down one path and close off another and so now I go down this one which is less about following its own path and more about wondering what was on the other path, which in a way is its own path but you get the idea.

So now I sit here and wonder if I did the right thing. Sure, I feel like this is something better to follow as, based on the words I had typed I felt I was going to write something that was something that would be far too familiar in a sense, but perhaps this also is far too familiar and really all I’m doing is deluding myself into believing otherwise. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do though, or something.

So I wonder as I weave through paths what paths I am taking and I wonder as to what happens to a path I don’t take. Maybe there is some sort of split off in terms of universes or something and one is full of possibilities. That said, the one I follow is full of both possibilities firmly rooted in reality, and whilst it can be good to think of what choices aren’t made, I’m doing okay where I am and I think it’s a bit better.

Actually it could be worse. Could be much worse. Perhaps there is a great deal of danger that I keep throwing myself into. I don’t know and now that I think about it I’m not sure if I want to know. Maybe I should try and go back to what was instead of doing this. Really not sure. Not sure anymore.

I think it is time to reverse time and take the other path, but then again I might find myself in the same predicament. As that too is possible, I think I’ll just keep going forward.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:18:22

Not good, not bad, but certainly lacking.

Written at home.

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Heavy in the Afternoon

This was taken a few weeks ago.
I was trying to get a sense of the clouds looming over what felt like a nice afternoon. Sort of an impending sense of bad weather.

I hope you enjoy.

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Pockets in the Rock

I took this photo trying to frame this bit of rock in a particular way and I almost got what I wanted. I was also trying to get across an idea of the pockets looking like little shelters or residential spaces. It’s something I want to incorporate into something I’m working on and I think in terms of a visual reference I captured this well.

I hope you enjoy.

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The View Outside

A photo similar to this one but in a different room.
Sometimes a room feels much like this, and this particular room did.

I hope you enjoy.

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Bark Psychosis: Eyes and Smiles

One listen and I’m not quite sure that just describing was the right thing. I think that what I’ve written works well enough as there’s a sense of the song, but I wonder if drawing out  something else would’ve worked better.

Bark Psychosis’ “Eyes and Smiles” is from Hex.

I hope you enjoy.

Percussion lightly booms and sprays, and guitar comes in, drifting quietly, and they move together, and soon vocals come in and they too seem to drift. They seem, maybe not relaxed, but lacking desire to be anything more than they are.

Bass arrives and carries underneath as words draw long and quiet and sometimes a little louder. Something comes into the background, dispelling the space a little, and the vocals disappear, much like the bass did earlier. The guitar and percussion continue their dance and now find something else joining them, taking specific actions to move through the sound as it continues with its misery, regardless if said misery is actual, implied or imagined.

Bass and vocals return and the vocals continue their drift, and the percussion grows in fullness, keeping the drift steady, and guitar plays out its few notes, moving slowly and steady. Soon brass comes in, calling out, reaching and gently lashing, and it draws long and all grows quiet.

Bass is playing through the dark and guitar seems to float off of it in pieces. Brass draws long once more, as though a shadow that follows a little closer than it should. The guitar picks up in its notes; keys flow on through, moving with grace and perhaps detached. Percussion resumes its beat, vocals return and repeat a phrase, and brass becomes lively, calling and howling.

Guitar grows louder and perhaps more aggressive in its gentleness. Vocals loop, brass calls and squeals; bass, percussion and keys keep a steady bass and soon the percussion and guitar shift once more, becoming harder, more striking. The vocals distort and call out over it all, cutting into the sound, almost breaking the spell, breaking everything, looping and it all continues on, drifting, driving, shifting whilst remaining still and the percussion grows gentle, and sounds fade away, leaving the vocals and keys in the last moment as the song ends.

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Fabric in Motion

Last weekend I went to some sand dunes with my partner to take some photos.
We took some fabric with us as I wanted to see if I could capture their flow in the breeze. When we arrived the breeze was quite gentle so some photos took advantage of that and some required a bit of work form my partner.

When I process photos I’ll sometimes push some things further than I normally would. When it comes to processing I think I go more for “real” than I do “stylised” but I also like to play around a bit to see what happens. Sometimes I get something that I think will work, but even if I don’t I get to learn a little more. Anyway, the below is a result of playing around.

Part of the below was also in part trying to see if I could bring out the fabric (silk in this photo, as well as most of the rest taken) a bit more which was a success. I also ended up with something that looks like the result of someone trying to replicate Storm Thorgerson.

I like the form and shape seen in the fabric and my partner. I think there’s a sense of flow that comes through quite well.

This is my submission into the two hundred-and-sixty-first Lens-Artists Photo Challenge. The theme for this one is “Work in Progress“.

I feel this counts due to what occurred after my partner and I wrapped up. I realised I should’ve put myself more against the slope of the dune and we began discussing redoing the photos at some point. After we were back in the car and driving away we decided we’d plan out a shoot making use of fabric in the breeze, rendering the photos taken on that day as the initial step for something better planned.

The host of the Lens-Artists challenges cycles weekly between the following people:

Week 1 – Tina

Week 2 – Patti

Week 3 – Ann-Christine aka Leya

Week 4 – Amy

Week 5 – John Steiner

Week 6 – Sofia Alves

Week 7 – Anne Sandler

Week 8 – Donna

Week 9 – Guest host

Leya is curating this one. Amy is curating the next one.

I recommend participating in the challenges as they provide a fun way to interpret theme. If not participating, then at least you should still check out what others of the Lens-Artists community are submitting.

I hope you enjoy.

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My First Attempt at Hiking to Mount Dingo

Recently I said that I might write more about 2015. Still thinking of doing so, but here’s a ramble about when in 2016 I first attempted to reach Mount Dingo. I thought I wrote about this but I’m having trouble finding a record of doing so. I shared a few photos from the hike but a record of writing about it seemingly doesn’t exist.

Back in the far off year of 2016 I decided I’d head on out to Mount Dingo. I think I’d discussed doing it with Ewe around that time. I can’t quite remember, but if I did he wasn’t down for it yet. That would have to wait until the following year, of which I wrote about using far too many words, but I digress.

I went to Katoomba on a Friday night after work, I think. I can’t remember what I would’ve done on the train trip, though I’m fairly certain I wasn’t reading too much at the time. I’d been reading Rogue “by” Fabio and by Eugenia Riley earlier that year and it put me off a bit, though maybe I was reading Leviathan on Trial at the time I went on the hike, but I can’t remember. On one hand I have a vague feeling I didn’t bring a book, but the more I think about this trip the more I have an idea of wanting to read whilst in the tent so I probably took Leviathan on Trial with me.

Anyway, I got to Katoomba, went to The YHA where I’d booked a bed, dropped my stuff, then went to a nearby pub to get some food. I sat there and ate for a bit, talked to someone who also was up visiting and I can’t remember the details of the conversation, partly due to how loud it was at the pub and partly due to the audible stuff being right at the end when we left and were walking for a few minutes before going our separate ways, and I’m fairly certain it was just general life stuff that helped keep the cold at the back of our minds.

I got back to The YHA, went to sleep, woke up the following morning, got my stuff and headed off to a café. I may have went to the police station to grab an EPIRB either the night prior or in the morning. I’m fairly certain it was in the morning, but regardless I had one and that morning I went to eat. After that I’m fairly certain I spent time waiting for a bus to take me to a place near where I was going to walk, bus didn’t come as it was too early or I may have just missed one and so I ended up walking down to where I was going.

Either that or I caught the bus and went to The Three Sisters by mistake, though it’s possible I got off at a stop before reaching them and commenced walking. Essentially there was more walking than necessary due to my own error in judgement.

At some point I walked past Scenic World and still had a bit to go, and it was close to midday. I checked out some of the lookout points on the way and eventually I reached the start of Narrow Neck. Narrow Neck is a great place to walk but, when doable, it’s better to drive part of it if you’ve a good deal of stuff to carry… or at least get someone to drive you part of the way. It doesn’t cut much off the journey, but it gets you past an incline that is very much not fun to walk with a lot of weight on your back. I walked that incline and I’ll be happy if I don’t walk it whilst carrying a lot of stuff again.

By the time I got to the gate for the fire trail along Narrow Neck it was close to one in the afternoon so, in part due to the time and in part due to the cold I tried to keep a brisk pace. In places the trail was pleasantly sun-dappled but there was a cold throughout, and a sense of quiet. I’m fairly sure I saw a person here or there on the odd occasion, but otherwise it was just cold, quiet space. The wind, when apparent couldn’t cut into the silence.

At the time I began to feel a sense of loneliness. It was a beautiful day, but despite the cycling of grand openness and focused, directed space being something to truly appreciate, I still longed for companionship and that longing was worsened by having someone I knew regularly contacting me in a way that was getting uncomfortable. Eventually I had to tell that person to stop contacting me, which was shortly after they started appearing in my suburb and messaging me about being there. That was a good few months after this walk though.

At the time of the walk they’d reached out to me again and it affected my mood. I hurt and I kept on walking, but eventually the sense of loneliness significantly lessened. It would’ve been nice to get to Mount Dingo and see the sunset with someone and it would’ve been nice to not have someone leaving me feeling uncomfortable, but I was out there on my own and I’d chosen to do the walk by myself and that too was nice. It was nice to see views I’d seen before but from differing angles, and it was nice to have the sense of silence. It wasn’t freeing, but it was peaceful and quiet and lively, and it was also relieving to be there.

I eventually reached a toilet which I used. It was next to a fire tower. I think I may have found it odd at first but pretty quickly realised that having a toilet next to a fire tower made sense. I then continued on my trek and eventually reached the end of Narrow Neck.

I had a brief break, in part to work out where to go from there as the path wasn’t clear to me. I saw the greater openness visible from that point, and in parts it just seemed to go on. It was nice, but it wasn’t something I could take my time with as sunset would soon begin. I was pretty sure there was still a bit to go but I remained optimistic about reaching my goal.

As a side note I’ve been writing this over a few months. Just bits and pieces here and there, then putting off writing a bit more. I don’t think it has helped in the slightest.

I found the way forward and started making my way to Tarros Ladder. Tarros Ladder is a series of rungs and stakes driven into a cliff face. It’s roughly eight metres and it’s not exactly the easiest thing to do if you’ve a fear of heights. When I got there I checked out the descent to which my fear said a rough equivalent of “No”. I then figured I’d head back, but I couldn’t get up onto the ledge from which I came down. It wasn’t high but its space was narrow which was what made it difficult for me.

I started to think about the possibility of getting stuck there. I couldn’t go down and I couldn’t go up and sunset had begun. I felt overwhelmed as being stuck there was dangerous. I considered triggering the EPIRB. I’m fairly certain it was a few months after the walk, but at some point I’d found out there was a bypass to Tarros Ladder, but I didn’t see it then and I didn’t see it when Ewe and I made our attempt.

It was probably ten minutes (quite possibly more) of being stuck there and gradually despairing before I decided to get myself out of the situation by trying to go back up to the end of Narrow Neck. Getting back onto the ledge I came down from wasn’t easy but after a bit of struggling I succeede. I made my way up from there and I saw a little bird, to which I said “Pretty Bird”. I repeated it a few times as it was all I could say. I’m fairly certain I had a panic attack that started at the top of Tarros Ladder, but at the time I wasn’t thinking about that. My concern was just to get back to the end of Narrow Neck.

It was mostly dark and windy when I got there so I started worked quickly to set up my tent. There was difficult in keeping the pegs in the ground but eventually with my bike light, some perseverance and I think a few rocks I was able to get them into a spot where they would stay. I then went into the tent and rested.

Being able to rest was great and it helped me relax a fair bit, but it wasn’t long before I started growing concerned about the possibility of running into one of the fabled wild people in The Blue Mountains. Sometimes they’re referred to as yowies (which, to my understanding is a creature of Indigenous folklore) and sometimes they’re referred to as a bunch of people who live in the bush. As far as I’m aware they’re not real but on that night that was something my mind was pushing to the side for a while.

I eventually saw a bright light from outside the tent and I became quite worried that I was going to be abducted and this was it, but it was still better to stay in my tent. At the same time I had to urinate which meant leaving the tent. I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t want to see myself disappearing in this manner. I didn’t feel ready to have to deal with the terror of the unknown.

Anyway I left the tent and did my business and saw that the bright light was just the moon. Once done I diluted where I peed with water just in case it attracted anything, then got back into the tent and fell asleep not long after.

All things considered I woke up after a good amount of sleep. I saw the sunrise, took a few photos, had breakfast, packed up and left. On the way back I stopped off at the toilet and prevented someone else from using it just by my being there. I’m pretty sure I’ve also written about this happening but doing so is also something I’m having trouble finding. The thing is how often to you end up blocking toilet use in the middle of “nowhere” at an early hour of the morning?

Once done I continued on my way. The person who went to use the toilet wasn’t around. As I walked along I saw icicles hanging from a rock and I thought that was interesting.

The walk was long, or at least it felt long and I was growing sore. The weight of my pack felt heavier and so I stopped regularly for brief rests. The views were the same, but they also were different and the air was crisp and cold. I was slower, or at least it felt like I was slower, but I continued on and I remained as steady in my pace as I could.

When I reached the parking area at the entrance to the fire trail portion of Narrow Neck I saw someone there and I asked them for a lift. They were happy to oblige and once their partner arrived we were on our way.

They were keen walkers and did (I imagine they still do, but who knows what happens in seven years) their walks over many hours and lengthy distances. They had walked something like fifty kilometres through The Megalong Valley the previous day. I might’ve misheard it, but it seemed believable to me.

When I told them about what happened to me and where I camped they expressed surprise as the temperate had gotten to -3°C overnight. I hadn’t realised due to how well I slept (the sleeping bag I had was quite warm) and it helped explain the icicles. I’d thought about it being cold enough for them to be there when I saw them but it wasn’t something I thought much about. I’m pretty sure I was more interested in their appearance when they weren’t there the day prior than I was why they were there.

I can’t quite remember where the couple dropped me off. I’m pretty sure it was near the police station as I needed to drop off the EPIRB, but it might’ve been closer to Scenic World. Regardless, I was appreciative of their help and I returned the EPIRB before heading to Katoomba station to go home.

In writing about the first attempt I’ve remembered some things about the hike that were nice, but I’m also realising how much fitter I need to be for the third attempt. I also need to make sure that when it happens I’m properly prepared. Usual stuff.

I tried to write this in a way that captured the experience but to do that properly would require more words and less sloppy editing. I wrote something that is dry to read. Perhaps I was too concerned about creating a highlight reel which is something I try to avoid – probably too much – because it was life happening and that’s what I wanted to capture but I didn’t do a good job of.

It was a trip I was incorrectly prepared for, but it was still an experience that, both at the time and now I’m glad to have had. I reattempted the following year with Ewe (Even though the links are closer to the start of this rambling, here they are once more, just in case you want more dry writing) and the plan is to make another attempt at some point, hopefully within the next twelve months depending on what happens. But yeah, I’m glad both attempts happened. They were experiences and despite how tough they were at times, to me they were worth having.

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