Linckoln: Stars Breathing

Posted on February 9, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

One listen for this one.
Yet another song I’ve had queued up for a while.
I mostly was not actively trying to work out what to say with this one. When I did I didn’t linger too long which I think was good. I feel that, however, I may have been a bit all over the place but I like that I was able to touch on a few different things whilst still capturing the song.

Linckoln’s: “Stars Breathing” is from Dew.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Water flows peacefully and, among other sounds, gives a sense of the peaceful and idyllic. Soon something rises from underneath, however, and creates a sense of harshness.

Maybe it is not harshness, but rather dramatic flow of conversation. There is a sense of conflict, however. It is a sound that feels unnatural and it runs against a perception of natural, though maybe it feels unnatural due to not being easily discernible as something specific.

Keys soon trail off from this sound, as does something akin to woodwind. The woodwind disappears and more keys enter the space, more distant, and soon something that could either be the woodwind once more, or a facsimile of it appears. It gradually shifts and hardens and distorts, and spreads out and creates another level of conflict.

Perhaps this really is about the flow of conversation, but all seems to grow small underneath this new phase. The water remains and now sounds are less lively, or at least not lively in same way as before. Droning stretches out and elongates as it grows massive. The sounds become monolithic, gargantuan, and yet remain small. They create bodies that appear to have no end through connecting with each other, but they only exist in one point in time and are only that small point.

Eventually another sound bubbles up from the drones, and the water is distant, and the drones have grown warm and distorted, and that bubbling gradually rises in prominence, or at least it seems to have. There is something that could be profoundly sad here, and beautiful, and humbling, and yet it is none of those, but it is widening and it is grand, and within it something hums, and it grows more and more distorted but it remains as is and as was, and it continues on, and it begets something new and far beyond and pulsing and as bright noise, and it suddenly stops and the song ends.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1220: Struggle

Posted on February 9, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

There’s a lot of struggle that goes behind constantly churning out here, and sometimes I wonder if it’s more of a coping mechanism than it is a way to progress through things.

You spend so much time being told you’re this and that, then when you get into a position where you need genuine assistance it’s often not there, but such is the way of things I suppose.

I’m sitting here listening to the sound of cicadas and very much anticipating more than one person telling me that it will get better, or they hope things work out and even though I understand the sentiment that’s not something I think is helpful. Once more it is a need of financial assistance, though of course it’s more than that, but I’m sure you understand how these things go.

I’m continually punching on and pushing through and sometimes it helps and sometimes it doesn’t, but the weight I’ve allowed to be placed upon myself and the weight that others have thrown upon me has gradually grown in difficulty to handle and I’m trying to overcome, but it’s hard. I need support and I ask and it’s not there.

Everyone’s making their own way through life and you can only take so much of other people’s time, but you can also only offer so much of yours, and how much can you keep offering if it’s not coming back? Realistically you shouldn’t help people with the expectation that they help you at some point down the track. You should help people with the hopes that they end up in a better place in life, but if you need help and you’re not getting it then what do you do? You keep pushing on through and you keep on trying.

You can’t always be strong, however, but it’s a lot harder to not be strong when you’re not in a position with a safety net, and I think that’s something that a lot of people don’t understand. You end up spending a lot of time having to harden yourself as you’re surviving on the paycheck and you’ve little wiggle room. You keep trying to get into a better position, you hear promises and guarantees that go elsewhere and you keep on trying and it doesn’t change. You remain in a state where you’re constantly having to be tough and pushing through and persevering, much like others, but you don’t get a break, but you’re still told that something good will come your way so you keep doing the things that you’re doing and you keep networking and you keep on pushing through and ultimately it amounts to a lot of wheel spinning whilst you’re off the ground, but you see others get ahead around you, and you’re happy for them.

When’s that going to happen for you though?

So I sit here and I keep struggling and persevering as right now that’s the best I can do, but I need help, but I can’t.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 09:44:49

This is a really uncomfortable write for me, but I’m still sharing it here. It’s where I am now and it’d be dishonest to scrap it and do something else, I think.

Written at home.

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Swirl

Posted on February 9, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

I haven’t played around with light drawing in a while and probably won’t again for a long time. Not something I think much about doing, but perhaps I should more often, but anyway.

This was taken around the same time as the two prior photos I’ve shared. I was trying to create a spiral that went outward from a centre. This sort of captures that, but I think it would’ve shown that more effectively had I paid more attention to perspective.

Regardless, I like the result. I’m reminded of ribs, and I like how there’s this small mass floating behind the lines.

I hope you enjoy.

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Face at Front, Shadow at Back

Posted on February 8, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

From this angle the skull looks a little more goofy, I think.

This was taken around the same time as yesterday’s photo. With this one I was trying to align so that it appeared larger and a little more behind the skull than it appears here. It didn’t quite work out, but I think in terms of light contrast the photo works. I also think the flowers mostly came out really well; They’ve a good deal of clarity.

This is my submission into Leanne Cole‘s “Monochrome Madness” for this week. Participating is pretty straightforward and something I recommend. If you do, then include the tag “monochrome-madness” in your post.
If not participating, then at the least check out Leanne’s photography as well as what other people submit.

A lot of what people are submitting will likely end up here.

I hope you enjoy.

 

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The Stranger: The Wind Is Blowing Cold Across The Moor

Posted on February 8, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

One listen for this one.

I think I was just looking to describe the song here. Didn’t say much.

The Stranger’s “The Wind Is Blowing Cold Across The Moor” is from The Stranger.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Dry and hollow droning seems to gradually rise, then pause and start again. Something else finds itself in the movement and it seems more mechanical, though perhaps that is an illusion.

During the next pause a brief hum and the sounds rise again, and something appears among the noise. It is some sort of imagery but it is difficult to work out what it is, or if it is anything at all.

Eventually a low rumbling appears. It is masked but it is there. It too is not the clearest and perhaps that suggests some sort of apprehension to the unknown. It likely is nothing other than the shape of land, but not knowing can often lead to hesitation.

For a moment the sounds lower and a bit more is revealed, and it remains a low rumbling, though in a much smoother form. Noise floats around as the rumbling takes a central focus, and the rumbling grows louder, or at least more prominent. It hums out an eeriness as the noise seemingly picks up.

Something that sounds like the remnant of a voice becomes part of the noise and sound twists and becomes harsh, and the rumbling continues, and all is of a calm harshness.

Eventually all lower a little and suddenly the song ends.

 

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Skull Flowers

Posted on February 7, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

Last week I’d planned to take some photos using a bike torch as a light source. I’m still going to take those photos but that was postponed to take a photo of this skull vase with flowers.

I went in with two specific ideas for framing. When I was taking the photos I tried a few photos  with the below framing, and I think this particular one turned out really well.

I think the light balance and level of detail works in favour for skull and flowers as well as their reflection. I also think the shadow works with the sense of distance. It’s there; it’s apparent and even though it seems far it remains close.

This is my submission into the two hundred-and-thirty-fifth Lens-Artists Photo Challenge. The theme for this one is “Shadows & Reflections in Monochrome”.

The host of the Lens-Artists challenges cycles weekly between the following people:

Week 1 – Tina

Week 2 – Patti

Week 3 – Ann-Christine aka Leya

Week 4 – Amy

Week 5 – John Steiner

Week 6 – Sofia Alves

Week 7 – Anne Sandler

Week 8 – Guest host

Donna of Wind Kisses joined the Lens-artists team this year. It will be good to see how we can interpret her challenges.

Patti is curating this one. The next one is curated by Amy.

I recommend participating in the challenges. They’re open enough to allow for a fair bit of thinking about approach and closed enough to keep focus on meeting the theme of each one. If you don’t participate, you should still check out what others of the Lens-Artists community are submitting.

I hope you enjoy.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1219: Combining Self at Excessive Speed

Posted on February 7, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

I let the day get away from me once more. Not a good move, but now were’ here and soon I will be getting ready to head on out. I’ll just listen to whatever I want to listen to right now and that’s fine. It’s what I do most of the time anyway, and so… yeah.

The hours are ticking away so I need to grab onto what I can. Need to accelerate and become a speeding blur of something so fast that there is no telling what it is that I am. In this I will lose all sense of identity and perhaps a sense of self to go along with that. I will no longer be what I think I am (though there is always a good chance that I am not what I think I am anyway, but that’s neither here nor there) which will lead to becoming something else entirely.

Of course what I think I am and what others perceive me to be could be two very different things and so I might lose my sense of self and discover something new, but as others see this thing going right past them at a speed that seems impossible to move at, what I am to them will likely appear to be something entirely different.

What if I remain as myself but think I become something else entirely. What if I lose what I am even though it is right there with me throughout this whole ordeal? Perhaps some sort of new definition will be born if I somehow come to an understanding that my self was always there and never lost; I just lost sight of it.

This would occur after an indeterminate amount of time, of course. It couldn’t happen immediately as if that did happen then there would be no journey of discovery and transformation of perspective and that wouldn’t be as fun. Gotta keep the fun in there somehow. No fun, no journey.

Does the journey have to be fun? It could be entirely boring, dull, insipid. It could be entirely unpleasant, and that’s all okay as it is about what is gained from the whole thing rather than just having fun. The outcome could be one of failure, but even in failure there can still be something gained. Depends on the failure, really.

So anyway the new sense of self would combine with the old sense of self, or at least that is what I’d hope. I’d rather congealing rather than conflict and so in these suddenly a past that was always present becomes fully realised as present and two forms of the present merge into one and a new whole comes forth. It would be one that recognises both and sees them in cooperation for a better tomorrow and that would be just neat.

Of course, however, others would still have their own perception of what I am and that wouldn’t stop until I slow down to an acceptable speed.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 07:34:75

Not a bad speed. A bit of messiness here, but overall I think I get something across, even if it is not much.

As a side note, this was going to be titled “Understanding at Excessive Speed”, but I felt that would be a better title for something else that that title inspired as I wrote it, so I’m saving it for later.

Written at home.

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Susumu Yokota: Azukiiro No Kaori

Posted on February 7, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

This was written over two listens.

I queued this up tow rite about a while ago and didn’t get around to doing so until now. I planned to last night but something else took precedence and so I didn’t. I don’t know if the wait had any impact, but I like the result here. I feel it would’ve been better to try and interweave the song’s sense of smallness, as well as its sense of isolation, but I think that overall I described the song well enough.

Susumu Yokota’s “Azukiiro No Kaori” is from Sakura.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Beeping and stretching, and soon something else hums into existence. It strikes, stretches, then flickers and as the beeping continues as though a steady anchor. They rise in their prominence and soon find themselves joined by voices of a a crowd, perhaps joyous whilst also unaware of itself.

The voices seem almost disconnected and cutting into existence and harmonies with a prettiness whilst the beeping and strike continue with their pattern, though eventually the beeping stops. Its exit is not noticed and its disappearance eventually is.

For a brief moment another beeping comes in with urgency, though it does not last long and soon disappears. Perhaps it is the first one announcing its departure; perhaps it is one that was meant to join earlier but had to leave at this point and so rushes past.

A tapestry of stillness is weaved through the sounds’ motions as they orbit each other. Their motions are smooth and peaceful, and they look inward whilst avoid pressing.

Eventually the voices fade, leaving the strike to continue on for a few moments before finding a place to stop as the song ends.

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Five-Hundred Word Challenge 1218: Walking Down the Street

Posted on February 6, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

Alright, so seeing as I dropped the ball on the earlier attempt it’s time to do another attempt for today. I don’t want to as I’m in that state of laziness that requires a lot of energy to do very little, but here we are and so here I am.

It feels a little weird getting something done so far away from going to sleep, but it’s nice. It feels good in a sense, but I shouldn’t be congratulating myself just yet as there still is plenty of time to stop and procrastinate and stretch things out to an unbearable degree. If this happens, then it is what happens but this is something I don’t want to do, unless I do, in which case I do want to do this and… yeah.

Where was I?

So I was walking down the street in the way that most people do and I noticed that I wasn’t actually walking down the street. It was at that moment that I further realised that the street was walking down me… then up me. I was being trampled by that which I was meant to be trampling, as ordained by divine right.

I was not going to stand for this mostly due to it being very difficult to stand when a street is walking all over you. As such, I decided to call out to it and kindly request that it stop, but this did not work and so I had to deal with this.

Now the thing with streets walking all over you (ort at least in this instance) is that they take their sweet time and then extend that by quite a lot more time. As such it took a while and I had to wait. I could not read for I had no book with me and I could not listen to music as I had nothing on me which would allow my ears to be treated to the sweet nectar of sound. I had to stay there and wait and wait and wait some more.

The plus side to all of this is that it gave me a lot of time to think about things. I was able to think about where I was going in life and how I ended up in this situation, and I thought about these two things for quite a while. Unfortunately whilst I was unable to come to an answer for the former, I realised that with the latter there was no explanation as to why it was happening to me.

From there I realised that the universe has a chaotic nature and its inertia is powered by reaction to happenstance. A series of events with no rhyme nor reason, or at least none that I could discern within the limitations of my human brain.

Eventually this stopped and so I got up, dusted myself off and waited for the next breeze to arrive so I could float home as a cruel mockery of birds.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 06:42:03

Silliness abound here but I think it works. This feels around the right length, covers nothing and carries no worthwhile meaning. Overall for now I’m happy with this.

Written at home.

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Rambling Through a Desert

Posted on February 6, 2023 by Stupidity Hole

This was done as a five-hundred word challenge.
Forgot to log the time before I put it here.

Oh well.

I hope you enjoy.

—

Alright, time to get to it. Time to make the most of the day and turn it into a ball, or a series of shapes…

Wait; not going there again.

I see a breeze and I keep a window closed. Clouds sit above and seem to make things look more intense, but I’m not entirely sure. It could just be the fatigue holding me firmly within its ironclad grasp. It could be many things.

This day will be created from a series of thoughts and suggestions from the self to the self and in that I will find the answers that I seek, but there are no answers that I seek for what I am doing is just trying to make it to the end of the day before I fall asleep. There isn’t much to do and it all stretches out and becomes beyond reach so I drag myself along even though I could just quickly walk and I feel the sun beat down upon my back.

There is no sweat but I am perspiring and all that is coming out is heavy weight that keeps attaching itself to me unless I decide to return to bed, in which case it will all disappear. Problem is I cannot return to bed as I am required to sit here and wait for things to happen so I can leap into action, so I keep on walking and I keep feeling the drag but I will get there. I need to get there and topple all of this so I can be free for all of a few minutes before I need to get on with the getting on once more.

Actually I think I’ll just stick with the struggling. Rather walk through the desert getting increasingly heavy due to the amount of weight adding an increasing amount of drag which I then have to battle so as to be able to keep on going. Heading over sand, get a bit of drag. Heading over something smooth, get a bit of drag. Get a good bit of momentum going downhill, get a bit of drag.

It’s all a drag.

I wonder if there will be water, or maybe some ice in which I could just skate over for a while. Having not skated on ice before I’m sure I’ll get it right the first time around and there will be no issues to worry about. Of course I could not have this happen and instead be forced to face the challenge of the wind picking up sand and blowing it all over the place, and sand gets everywhere which leads to a lot of discomfort, let me tell you. There was this one time where I went bushwalking and went to a beach and ended up with sand in my socks despite my thinking I got rid of it all, and my feet felt salty and I had to walk back to the station in discomfort.

It was not much fun.

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